Missing Sequences

Saturday, 14 January 2023

Will Slither for Murder (Session 162)

SESSION 162: Detours can be Dangerous Places

After a much needed rest it was decided that minimally the horses needed to be checked on. Whether we would come back up was somewhat in question. This place was showing it’s true nature as a ‘festering sinkhole of evil’. It was decided they would head east and then along the main wall to the entry gates.

Not too many steps later they came upon a building in decidedly good shape beyond being covered in the dust of ages. The building was a black granitic stone and the door was of blackened iron. The door after being buffed up a bit was revealed to have engravings, some sort of ancient ophidian based symbology. The engravings were more similar to motifs found within the Nameless City on Carcosa than those that had already been observed in the Eyrire.

The hobos felt this was another chance at a pot of gold. Before Bunny could work on the door Ding-We elected to use a cantrip to open it. After whiffing on the loot haul within the Gem Prison they were hungry for a payday. The cantrip failed. The door was magically sealed. Dinger would have to use something a little more potent to crack it open. With a ‘knock’ the door was opened. The front lines pushed in. Shock of shocks the joint was full of snakes and there was a huge cobra statue, before a pit that was also full of snakes, with a naked chick atop the head doing her best snake-dance. The hobos came in a little too casually and lost the drop on the naked chick. “Blasphemers! Destroy them my children”.

She was fast and dropped a blade barrier in front of the hobos while directing snakes to attack from the sides. Th front lines were quickly knee deep in serpents. In retaliation Ding-We conjured a wall of fire around the blade barrier and the sides from which the snakes were pouring in. “Smells like a chicken barbeque”, drooled Steve. There was some concern as the chick had now been revealed to be a high level cleric but it was deemed that her and some little snakes were no match for the hobo armada. Bimbles was able to dispel the barrier and Ding-We dismissed his wall so the assault could commence. They were rushed by four giant vipers that had presumably risen from the pit of snakes. The cleric had disappeared. Bunny and Ramrod were able to spot her once they positioned themselves on the ceiling – damn spider climbing abilities. Subira (the cleric) had dropped into the shadows further back on the statues head, it looked like she was assembling her gear. The thieves crept forward looking to give her the shiv. The front lines held the giant snakes at bay while both divine and arcane powers were called down. Ding-We dropped a fireball into the pit blowing up and incinerating hundreds of snakes. Nara used the destructive power of her Carcosian mind to bow the head off of the statue. Evil Subira fell backwards down the statue, “Amaunet!” she screamed as our thieves pounced on her. Erupting from the pit covered in the charred remains of his children came Amaunet. It was a 15’ long demonic man-snake hybrid. As his fell gaze came upon the front line Rhagnar, Biff and Camillus collapsed in fear he then released demonic power to shatter the protective barriers erected by Bimbles and Carla. It then charged into the fray it was combat time! The thieves finished of the cleric but the demon was holding the hobos on its own slashing with wicked claws and thrusting forth its wicked spear. The demon then caught site of Carla. Filled with demonic glee it threw its spear. The weapon plunged into Carla’s green flesh after passing through the plates in her armor as if they were not even there and then Carla was gone.

Unbeknownst to the party Carla had been banished to the demon’s home on the 752^nd layer of the Abyss the plane of it’s master - Lachesis the demon lord of snakes. She was adrift in a waterless sea entirely made up of writhing snakes. The Sea of Snakes turned its attention to Carla. Biting and constricting. It looked like this vacation was going to end horribly almost as soon as it started.

Back on the Prime Material the battle raged. The demon fought with a madness perhaps because it sensed that its priestess/ fuck-toy/ spawn-factory had been destroyed or maybe simply because demons are engines of chaos. Whatever the reason this behaviour diminished it’s advantage to death. However before this happened somehow Carla was not actually gone nor impaled on a spear that was actually in the demon’s hand. Carla fought with a vigour not often seen and all memory of her being banished evaporated from all minds. After this the demon was finished off and it disappeared in a puff of Abyssal hate gas.

Forgotten by many but not Carla, she carried a very special little blue stone that when crushed could send all those within range back in time by ten seconds. Carla had to move quickly though as the clock was ticking and she was at the middle of an ocean sized ophidian feed ball. In the absolute knick of time Carla escaped her imminent death in the Abyss and came back fighting and fortunately avoided the critical blow that sent her there to begin with.

With the furious battle complete we had made another enemy of a dark god that of course did not impede the commencement of the looting. The clerics began a ritual in hopes of some divine guidance, the sense of dread would not recede. As they made offerings the rest of the gang had discovered the treasure after digging through a mountain of fried dead snakes in the pit. It seems that Ding-We’s fireball had done significant damage to the loot. A king’s ransom in coin, gem and jewelry had been melted into a glob of slag that would require some work to break out. Greymin was excited to do the work, it was the closest thing to mining he had done for some time. His treasure sickness propelled his labour. Looking into the pit the smarter members of the troop realized that other things of ancient origin probably did not survive the blast.

Carla and Bimbles had successfully established a link on the divine hotline. The accolade for undermining the forces of Chaos once more rung a bit hollow when they learned that the very presence of a mallor demon fouls liquids in it’s vicinity. That included all liquids, most importantly magical elixirs. This was a blow. Vial after vial lost. This may have solidified their next step – no more opening doors, back to the horses! They had victory and treasure but the Fates had found a new way to exact a toll.

And like snakes the hobos slithered back to the front gate and through the ferris wheel chamber back to the chimney passage that lead to their base camp. “I sure hope the horses learned kung-fu while we were gone, that would really help”, mused the super not bright Hobo Steve.

The thieves setup the descent line and entered into the chimney with the first load of hobos. The group began their journey down the chimney. About 100’ into the decent a ‘tack tack tack tack’ noise was heard coming from the darkness below. The man-snake demon had dispelled all of Carla’s light stones so the group was travelling with a little less illumination than usual (Rhags gem of brightness and a glowing Saff). As a less than agile Rhagnar tried to adjust his orientation on the rope to shine his light down a new horror appeared below.

A stone coloured creature with the body of a spider and two draconic heads on long necks. The horror opened both mouths and expelled a strong stench of gas, and then belched forth two streams of fire. Fortunately for the climbers the portion of rope within their hands was enchanted and did not get destroyed outright. Steve and Rhags dropped onto the beast while the thieves attacked from the sides. The creature created a web that engulfed Saff and partially obscured site for the rest of the group at the top of the chimney. If only the creature was not simply a bestial intelligence it might have killed Steve and Rhagnar but instead it was driven by blind bloodlust and this, in the end, spelled its doom. As the creature’s lifeless body fell the final 100’ with a juicy splat Steve and Rhags rushed after it in hopes of finding riches that had been sitting inside of its stomach(s). No such luck, just lots of guts and gore all over the place. Eventually the rest of the party made it down and the thieves decided to do another investigation of the chimney. About 50’ up they discovered a virtually invisible trap-door composed of stone and webbing. This was the spider-dragon’s lair. A short tunnel lead to a chamber with a number of desiccated humanoid husks most likely tomb robbers that had not been so lucky. It seems that once again fire had likely destroyed many valuables but there was a heavy leather backpack filled with gold coins. It was something.

The hobos progressed the rest of the way back to the horses without trial. Now they just had to dig their way back to the horses. A bit tedious but the stone barricade likely protected the mounts from the beast. They began moving the stones.

ROLECALL

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C9) 250538 xp +10% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C8) 214778 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm

Hobo Steve the Superhero (F8) 212423 xp +5% <240,001> CRT 1d24/V

Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 177260 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

Raul the Voyager (MD8) 188805 xp +10% <240000> CRT 1d12/III

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4,

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 404555 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I

Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 184055 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 118078 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Mad Ribbits (FY7) 137081 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 135460 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 72067 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 84562 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

Lasting injury: Crushed spinal column -6”H, -5’mv, -10% thieving

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 88462 xp +10% <100000> CRT 1d10/III

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 21490 xp +10% <32000> CRT 1d16/IV

Camillus the Myrmidon (F6) 59015 <65001> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

Greymin the Dwarven Hero (D5) 21691 <35000> +5% CRT 1D14/III

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 59275 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Felix Ignatius Hemlock the previously Skeletal Sleuth (I7) 42208 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Canon of Yrrrg. (C6) 40211 <50001> CRT 1d10/III

Yasser Imaphat the Djinn (D4) 30372 <32501> CRT 1d6/II

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swordsman (D3)

Wendul the Thaumaturgist (W5)

RESERVES

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 45913 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

REMAINING RECUPERATION: 0 DAYS

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON)

Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON) -ADJUSTMENT REQ’D

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 319718 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

REMAINING RECUPERATION: 0 DAYS

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm

Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

Multiple Injuries: lost 20 teeth, drools a lot CHA -1

Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

Elapsed Campaign Time

344 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-Sixty-Three when we ask the questions:

Are we coming (back) or going?

Will the horses still be alive?

Tale of the Tape

Carla went to the Abyss but was the one person with an escape trick - Booo

KILLS

Snakes hundreds

Giant giant pit vipers (4)

Subira High Priestess of Lachesis

Mallor Demon

Draconid

LOOT

Snake plate (green) +2 (+2 vs. poison)

Snake Shield (green) +2 (+1 vs. poison when matched with armor)

Coin (gold & platinum) slag with embedded gems and jewelry (63,365)

40,000 gp

1,900 pp

Gems (15): 3025 gp

Jewelry (4): 1340 gp

5000 gp

Sunday, 8 January 2023

Murder was the Best Tool (Session 161)

SESSION 161: Escape from the Gem Prison of Zardax

Here we are again, at the start. Ding-We had a bit of a moment. What did it all mean? They had no idea and so they searched the chamber to exhaustion. It provided no answers. Nothing to do other than press on, one more time.

They were greeted by a freezing cold, it was the lair of the ice people – err Elves. That was their truth you know the type that doesn’t have any basis in reality but they will fight you for it. There was some back and forth. Dinger was not happy to be back but Carla felt there was a reason for the return. She ended up being correct but it took us awhile to get there. After dither-fucking for longer than needed they realized/ remembered (with coaching) that they has only exhaustively searched two-thirds of the chamber. Back to the corridor with the bags, which they mostly took this time, a search was actually commenced of the room. There was a latched now more secret door after being painted over when the “new management” had taken over. It was popped open.

A grossly vivid yellow chamber lay beyond. They had seen flashes of it before but could not/ did not enter. This time they did. “Oh hey guys! Welcome to the prison exit. We are the guards. Come on in look around we are a laid back bunch of dudes”. Twenty owl-headed naked human bodies with rapiers casually greeted our gang. There was a large green door with a gem-shaped emblem with a noticeable key-hole at its centre. “Go ahead take a look prisoners, you can look but you cannot touch”, they engaged us in further pleasant chit-chat as the hobo brigade assessed the situation.

This is the exit?

Sure is dudes.

Can we leave?

Nope. That is why we are here. We are the guardians of portal…

Well accidents do happen when we get distracted.

How do you get distracted?

Live feeding.

….?

We could be distracted by a cannibalicous snack, if you know what we mean.

Uhhhhh.

Any of you would do even the little thing they tend to be spicy.

How about just a toe or two?

Nope.

A leg?

Nope. We need a complete live feeding.

There was some thought about offering an ice man-elf but the chamber was likely gone and it was kinda evil. They asked if the bag of baby teeth that had been found in the ice chamber would do. The owls admitted that they are a lovely little treat and would have been a good distraction if they had been thrown down the hall or better yet had been seeded out an open door. The sound of little teeth clattering off a hard surface makes any bird brain momentarily lose it’s mind. Instead the bag containing them was simply dropped at the guardians feet. “Kinda rude dudes, really diminished our interest in a crunchy treat”.

At this point it was realized that the reasonable alternatives to fighting their way out had been expended. Ding-We and Carla came up with a plan. Game on. They all began singing and milling about the green door as Ding-We began an incantation. The Owl-dudes saw this diversion for what it was and leapt to action. They were too slow, an icy barrier sprung up around the hobos providing some much needed time before the guards were able to smash it down. Bunny unlocked the portal and it began to open. The wall only stopped the Owls momentarily. Raul, Saff and Bimbles unleashed magicks that reduced the active force of Owls but they were legion and potent. The fighter types attempted to hold the line as the softer members of the party jumped through the portal. Biff and Dolec took a beating but were able to extract themselves. Rammer had his fill and gulped back a potion of gaseous form and flowed like a fart towards the portal. Steve thought this might be his ‘Last Fight’ and quaffed a potion as well but a more heroic choice than Slinker the Stinker. The clock was ticking and the door began to reform. There was a little bit of space to move and with just enough luck the hobos were able to utilize it allowing the remaining members to make the big escape just before the proverbial noose tightened. “So long and thanks for all the teeth”.

Into a strange psychedelic void followed by a flash.

Thump.

Once more were in the chamber where they happened upon the Gem Prison. They had escaped and now felt like they had not slept in days. The hobos hunkered down before deciding on the next move. They just needed some time to shake off the experience.