Dungeon Meat (Session 237)

SESSION 237: Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. 10 – Lost in the 4^th Dimension -- Dungeon Meat

Hunger takes over and maybe we cross the line.

 

Day 182 continued; Status: Stage I dehydration; water supply – full 248 pints; Food – none  

Uncertain what to do next the chamber of the Space Ooze is searched, the bones of Lady Versamage stowed away and we learn a bit about the young elf-girl (77!) Katre. Nothing helpful found or uncovered. They then dropped a bone through the ooze window/portal. It landed in the ‘space’ corridor. Disorganized and without a plan they decided to fall back to the ‘safe-space’ park for a drink before returning to the humming crystal chamber. They just could not leave the singing sword behind. It seemed that their growing hunger dictated wasting as much time as possible. Sloth grabbed the sword. It began singing and Sloth returned to dancing with it, Swinging the sword around like a conductor of some goofy orchestra. Still without a structured plan they once more headed back to the park. The commotion of their travel through the corridors of the 4^th dimension made it easy for a troop of strange scaly apes to get the literal jump on the gang. 

The apes were fast and rather aggressive. 

The hobos hungry, slow and the frontline were already in haggard shape. Raul and Wendull realized that now was not the time to hold consumables. Magics were released from rod and wand. This turned the tide of the simian blitzkrieg and not a second too early. The apes were unrelenting, maybe it was the damn techno-noise coming from Sloth’s new sword. They did not say and we dd not ask. The fight was over, to the hobos once more went the spoils. These bad monkeys were packing an inordinate amount of loot. Coins, gems, jewelry and special stuff. 

The gang grabbed the loot and returned to the park to examine their swag. Aside from the currency and sparkly adornments they now had a wand, a treasure map and a shield with a green copper foiling of a face that appeared about to vomit. Raul checked out the items while Boris and Gurn investigated the map, “Hmmm. What luck. It looks like the rough monkey map leads to right over their”, Boris pointing to a rock cluster just upstream partially hidden by the shade of an adjacent tree. “Yup sure does. We could use some more gold in case of an emergency” came from Gurn. The dwarves inspected and retrieved a loot filled sack from between the rock formation. Raul used this time to learn that the shield would not leave his arm as the ding-danged thing was cursed, “Ah. Crud…”. 

After counting the mountain of coin and such liberated from the apes the hobos faced a new predicament. How the hell do we carry another 350 or so pounds? We would have to crawl and that would likely only lead to death by starvation. Sasha had one solution and Boris another. The ranger pulled a mule, with saddlebags, from her funky jacket and Boris figured they would need to eat the apes. He did not really care or know anything about man’s genetic relationship with monkeys or did anyone else for that matter. “We got enough dungeon monkey meat to get us back on our feet. Along with the stream we can rest here for two days to shake off our funk”. The plan was unanimously supported. 

The big boys went back to the battle ground to claim their dinner. Luck held and nothing else was chewing on the still mostly fresh corpses. They returned and kicked off the picnic party. The park would not be left in the same condition as they found it.

“This stuff doesn’t taste like chicken”, was Willy’s observation. “No, no it doesn’t but I think I like it”, lisped Ramrod as he slurped some meat from a femur. Ike was happy to agree with the assessment even though he did not really know what chicken tasted like as he thought that knowledge would be ethically troubling. 

Cannibalism has never been so easy.  

 

Day 184  Status normal: water supply – full 248 pints; Food – none

During the halcyon days of eating ape within the perpetually pleasant and safe park the goobers had mulled over their next step. As they saw it, there were two options. There is always more options but the battered skull of your average hobo does not seem to keep track of such things. Either go through the ooze window or backtrack once more to the humming crystal chamber a check out the repeatedly forgotten ‘other corridor’. 

They chose the latter.

It lead to the easy-side of a secret door. Beyond was the backside of a waterfall. After a quick wash they stood in a large circular chamber that was an open meadow covered in flowers and knee deep grass. The walls were rough granite. There were two passages exiting the chamber and the waterfall streamed down from some unknown source. The mule, Herb was happy to start grazing, with Katre standing idle beside. The real hobos pressed into the chamber. They were greeted by groans as zombies slowly arose from their grassy cover. Ike was hot and excited to smite some undead once more. For a bird-guy-thing he really does not like the walking dead. The zombies were slow and with only a slight numerical advantage that disappeared in seconds. A few seconds after that the party was over. Ol’ Herb barely had a chance to stop chewing. 

The post petite melee looting turned up two things. First, one of the zombies had a wicked looking black longsword strapped to its back. Second, a small sack with four pieces of well-preserved meat inside. 

Boris gobbled a chunk back and immediately felt better. Raul, figuring things could not get worse for him (Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation) gave the black blade a once over. The quillons, grip and pommel were in the form of a bound demon with the ricasso erupting from the demon’s mouth. There were also runes along the fuller. Felix would appreciate such description but we have not seen him in ages. Raul was no Felix by a long shot (some people like him) was able to piece together the nature of Demon’s Lament! He was elated to that he figured it out and was not the proud recipient of a second cursed item. So as a bonus he checked out the previously acquired, and almost forgotten, rainbow ‘prismatic’ belt. It was also not cursed. Instead it held the ability of a singular formidable illusionary magick each day. After that he tapped out and hit the shower – good work kid!

 

The hobos cleaned up and grabbed a drink as they once again stalled in committing to their next action. 

 

ROLECALL 

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 254688 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Electrical Dwarven Lord (D9) 356613 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Major Corruption: Crackles with electrical energy              

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 157794 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 173261 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119090 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 23778 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 45526 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  83707 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  23914 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Ike the Duck (DF6) 

Katre the Elf-Girl (E2)

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire – Cooking & Cleaning

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 33 days (from group A)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (627) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Thirty-Eight when we ask the questions:

Really, just how adjacent to cannibalism is eating apes even if they did have scales?

Which way will they go?

Will our B-Team ever escape wherever they are?

Will they find a reliable source sustenance before they eat the Elf-girl?

And if they don’t will she really be much of a meal?

How the Hell did allow this much loot to be distributed to such a band of gombahs?

Tale of the Tape

Location hex: ??dreamlands??4^th Dimension??Somewhere else??

Raul is now the proud owner of Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation 

Lady Versamage’s bones travel along inside a sack

 

KILLS

Lorne Apes (6) 

Zombies (15) 

LOOT

The Singing Crystal Sword (Sloth)

Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation (Cursed AC9)

Wand of magic missiles (17 charges; 1-2 missiles/rnd)

Demon’s Lament – Runed black longsword w/blade coming from demon’s mouth (+1,+3 vs. demons; Pro Evil 10’ 1/day)

Medicinal Meat (4) one consumed by Boris

2,000 pp

27,000 gp

Gems (31) 4,230 gp total

Jewelry (16) 14,800 gp total

Murder Pudding (Session 236)

SESSION 236: (Side Session): Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. 9 – Lost in the 4^th Dimension

They find water in the nick of time only to run out of food and then face off with a replicating space pudding that ended up being a temptation.

 

Day 180 continued; Status: Stage II dehydration; water supply – none; Food – low 2 days: The dithering ended with a sicky pustulant pop. Melty guy was mort. From the goop arose a demonic mockery of life. Bat wings sprouting from the resinous body that was held up by a host of child-like arms. The mass was not done as a vulturous beak emerged and then shot out on an appendage like a chameleon’s tongue. All the while mouths bubbled to the surface of the tarry body. The mouths followed the beak with the ejection of acidic mucous covered boney structures. Things got messy and the tanks were stuck ensuring the thing did not break through the line even though both Sloth and Boris could think of a thousand different horrors they would prefer to face. Willy (well Agolloch) teleported behind but the ancient blade bounced off the thing just like Raul’s magical missiles. The bubbly-man demon thankfully did not have friends. Our B-Team got the job done but the front and second lines took a beating. 

They fell back to the humming crystal chamber to clean up and gather their thoughts. Boris saw no good solution they needed water and it was not behind them, “Keep marching till yer dead” growled the unusually morose bearded keg with legs. They once more fell into order and went ‘south’.

 

It was another indeterminately long rock corridor. It did eventually bend and reveal an illuminated chamber ahead. They proceeded with caution, not wanting to roll into Dr. Vod’s waiting room or some such thing. Keen senses noticed some unexpected detail, a subtle sweet scent. The chamber gave off a greenish hue and there was a reason for that. Standing at the precipice they were gobsmacked. The room consisted of a lovely park with a stream. The smell of ripe berries filled the air as light gently filtered down through the canopy above. There were lovely shrubs throughout giving the whole place a curated park like appearance. They were so thirsty but this simply looked too good to be true. They cautiously entered and began to disbelieve and investigate, this cannot be real. It was. They had found the ‘safe space’ but it would take some time to figure out. When that time expired they hit the stream like check cashers on the last Wednesday of the month – right after letting Ike test the liquid, “Wahg! This stuff is wet goodness I tells ya!”. 

After drinking their fills the water supply was replenished and their thoughts went towards the rest of the chamber. They spent a couple of hours searching the park. Sasha found a good handful of good-berries, a tree branch lever and determined that the trees were odd as she could not climb up to the canopy it was always ‘aways away”. Raul displayed his uncanny abilities as a mega-dungeon explorer, “..Say Boris and Gurn if you were to look at that slightly inconsistent stone wall behind the good-berry bush which you are standing, you would see something interesting”. “You mean this mostly hidden portal right here?, Gurn tapped the stone while Boris just waited for the direction to pass. “Ya that’s right. You could have missed that”. “uh huh..”, mumbled your pick of dwarf. The gang fell back to the central area of the chamber to share findings and plot the next step.

They needed two days to stabilize the matter of dehydration and that was considered the priority even if it meant running out of food. Two days rest and then they would have about four days to find more drink and sustenance. 

 

Day 182 Status: Stage I dehydration; water supply – 248 pints; Food – none: The pair of days passed without complication. On the morn of the second day they began considering where to go next. They could backtrack to the humming chamber and take the ‘west’ passage or take the obscured door. The branch lever ended up opening the boulder/ altar door that presumably led back to Vod. Boris had some choice words regarding this discovery but we do not need to repeat them here. Behind the door was the decided direction. The tunnel lead to a room it became noticeably colder with each step. The room was so freezing cold that the hobos could see their breath in the air. They were greeted by an overwhelming smell of ozone coming from the room with its skeleton littered floor. There were also two fleshy entities. An elven girl whom was unconscious and a wounded and battered but still haughty female fighter of obvious skill. “I think you meant ‘hotty’”, meta-gamed an unusually perspicacious Steve. 

Before she could warn our gang of the unclear and present danger it dropped onto Boris’s head. An amorphous blob emitting a powerful coldness, it was a space pudding! It appeared as black shadows full of tiny shimmering lights. Ramrod pointed out that it was “like totally cosmic man”. The observation did not help Boris as the thing was corrosive and was suffocating him. “I am Versamage now give me a weapon!”, screamed the warrior woman. Sloth leapt to action first tossing his spear to the Versamage and then he clasped the pudding, pulling it off of Boris and tossing it to the ground. Right after this series of successful actions things went downhill quickly. Sloth’s hands were immediately scorched from touching the things. Boris got his wits and wacked the things but the impact of his blow caused two more puddings to split off of the thing. Simultaneous with the dwarf’s blow Lady Versamage, stuck one of the pudding babies with the spear. She received two rewards. The first was two more puddings the second was less fun. Versamage was then knocked out and overrun by a fresh pudding that then proceeded to transform her into puddle juice. We only knew her for seconds – ouch. Things were grim. It got to the point where the gang were almost overrun by puddings, damn things were worse than tribbles. Really, tribbles were just fur balls these puddings seem to exist by living the mantra that all flesh must be dissolved. Being that this is not the final testament of the B-Team they did win, no one escaped unscathed but they did beat the pudding brigade. Once the final pudding was popped a final weird thing happened. 

The blob bits then congealed on the floor in a perfect circle. It is like a mirror except that the image within is not a reflection. What could be seen within was a gridded walkway, cold white walls and a closed metal door. “Ugh, what the hell is this? Get me outta here!”, Ramrod once again a paragon of optimism. They were perplexed by this situation and decided to defer acting on this pudding window and decided to give the unconscious elf-girl a little attention.

                                                                                    

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 301296 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 254688 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 356613 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)                         

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 157794 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 173261 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119090 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 23778 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 45526 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  23914 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Ike the Duck (DF6) – AVATAR form.

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire – Cooking & Cleaning

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 33 days (from group A)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (625) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Thirty-Seven when we ask the questions:

What is up with this pudding window/ portal/ Palantir-like image relay? 

How far down the rabbit hole are we?

How do we get back inside the dead space worm and do we even want to?

What are we going to do with this Elf? (we know what are track record is with pointy ears)

How will we ever get home?

Will we ever get home?

Tale of the Tape

Location hex: ??dreamlands??Somewhere inside the Space Worm??The 4^th Dimension??

Lady Versamage Jesmae (F7) she made a quick impression before being melted

Katre the Elf-Girl (E2) appears to be rescued.

KILLS

Bubbly Guy Demon 

Space Puddings (8) 

LOOT

none

They Call Him Doktor Murder (Session 235)

SESSION 235: (Micro-Side Session): Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. 8 – Ahhh Crud!

Around they went thirstily, time was not the only enemy. 

 

Day 179 continued Pt. 2 (not of this world); Status: Stage I dehydration; water supply – critical < ¼ day; Food – low 2 days: With three fish in their hungry hands they decided to set a fire to both cook an early dinner and try getting water (salty) from the blood/water of the lake (crater). After some mucking about they were eating and had produced a limited volume of separated liquid content to add to the very meager water supply. During this time something was attracted to the light, smoke and scent of their activities. It could be heard grunting and such in the darkness on the far side of the bloody pond. They never figured out what it was and the thing did not enter the blood/water to initiate anything. 

Mini-camp ended and they took the rocky corridor that went ‘north’. Hiking for a couple of hours for an indeterminant period until they finally approached something marginally interesting – a corner! And then light from beyond. Boris called out a parlay to the unknown source of illumination from around the corner. Four weirdo gladiators came around and into the light. Wearing sandals, loin cloths, full helmets and bearing small buckler shields in one hand and gladiuses in the other. Boris continued his attempt at parlay but these guys were simply jock(straps) fixing for a fight and did not give a hoot about odds. They launched into Sloth and Boris. Willy (Agolloch) teleported behind to shiv one it worked but the outcome was paltry. It seems that these guys were well greased and Agolloch sliced rather than pierced. It was around this time that it was realized that Agolloch’s handler was nearly dead and would likely not survive a single hit but Agolloch did help out as the wound was enough to paralyze gladiator 3. The greasy gladiators were a quick bunch and our team were notably off their game due to dehydration, it looked like Willy was doomed as gladiator 4 turned towards him. Miracle of miracles the hobos gained initiative. Wendull charmed the mook on Willy all was well, or so they hoped. Wendull had just made a new personal friend of G4 but that did not change G4’s perspective on the rest of the hobos and Wendull had not had any chance to manipulate this, he had not had an opportunity to speak yet and even if he had one would ‘think’ that communication might be difficult over the din of combat and his actual position down the line (~30’ from his new chum). This was all moot though as each group acted simultaneously. Camillus recognized the situation and took out G4 with a wonderful spear toss, we won’t mention that she had mucked up the same action the previous round. They then finished up G1 & G2 before turning to the paralyzed G3. Boris attempted to interrogate the jerk but he was straight up a jerk. Agolloch terminated the conversation before handing control back to Will, “It was a boring conversation anyways”. Boris’s next ‘A+’ idea was to collect the gladiator’s gross loincloths and have Camillus carry them that went over as expected, “Suck a goat’s nipple runt”. Instead they cleaned up drank the last of their salty water/brine and pressed on. Once more a corner was found. Something had been here somewhat recently and had pissed on the wall leaving a sizable puddle, “That bastard ain’t thirsty”, Gurn lamented. Walk on, ding-dongs. 

 

A short while later a light could be seen from way down the corridor. It ended up being from a laboratory, focused on experimental biological enhancement procedures. This ancient laboratory has wicked instruments lining the shelves.There are dissected cadavers stretched upon the sturdy wooden tables. The lone occupant was Doktor Vod, a wrinkled old man with spectacles and a blood-stained apron. “Ah vello vriends, I am Vod. Could I vinterest any ov you vith Vod pervorming an enhancing surgery? Vod has the cutting edge ability to enhance the liver, brain, kidneys, muscles, stomach, or lungs! Step vright up the first in your group to ve enhanced”. 

Boris quickly refused the gracious offer and moved to blathering about his problems, “ Have you gots any water man?” “No zorry my vriend I do not, perhaps you should reconsider enhancement to alleviate your problem?” 

“Nope. Have you got any food?” Rammer simultaneously threw a question, “ Hey man how the hell do we get out of here?” “No food either my vriend but again I zink enhancement may resove your problem. And you mister limpy lisp, you can plainly see two passageways. Zat is both how you get in and out”. Boris stewed as Ramrod began turning apoplectic, “No no no! Where is the sky you withered old grape!?!” “Oh I have not zeen the sky for quite zome time. I work in my laboratory don’t ya know? I zink that maybe a brain enhancement would ve most beneficial to you”. “Arg. No”. 

A conclusion began to bubble up from many the murderous mind - Doc Vod only conducted surgeries. Ramrod began the storming out, down the other passage heading ‘west’. “Oh vell, I vill be here if you change your minds, good-day vriends”.

They marched for some time, just enough for Rammer to simmer down and then lose it once more. The corridor ended or was more accurately blocked by a huge boulder. Beside the chunk of stone was a small non-descript altar. Rammer quickly began to boil as things were revealed to likely be a puzzle. Behind the boulder was a door. How do we get to the door? How do we deal with a boulder that fills a 10’ corridor? The fiddled and stuff until the final act of violence, smashing the altar, left them with the distinct sense that they had removed one of the pieces from the challenge – effectively ending the ordeal. They were now both thirsty and exhausted and decided to camp at this monument of hobo misery. In their diminished state they did not even post guard simply ate the last of the giant bass and passed out. 

 

Day 180; Status: Stage II dehydration; water supply – none; Food – low 2 days: Hours later it appeared that things worked out. Nobody was killed during their sleep. They marched back to Vod’s. “ Ah vello vriends you have returned because you vrealize the benefits of experimental enhancement surgery!” “No no no! You must have water for us. You must clean your tools with water” “Vater on my tools why would I do that?” drawing attention to his crusty bloody tools. “We need to search you laboratory then” “Now vriends that would not be polite and I vill not allow it” “We don’t care” “Vriends. I must tell you that disturbing my laboratory vill not be tolerated”. Ramrod ever the paragon of virtue, “Screw you ya old goof! Sloth, Camillus keep an eye on him”. The two lunks stepped towards Vod as the rest went to commence the search. Like a cobra Vod struck out with his scalpels at the ‘protection’. His aged shell was not only lightning fast but strong. “Take care of him”, shouted Rammer. Sloth and Camillus pulled their weapons as Boris moved towards the entanglement. Vod pointed a finger at Sloth, “Die you behemoth, Die!” as sickly green energy roiled from the doctors finger and into Sloth who’s giant heart was able to resist the finger of death. It now appeared like this could be serious. Wendull released a wave of magic missiles they were ineffectual the swords however were drinking deeply into Vod. It looked like he was not long for his mortal coil and he was not. He was however once more far faster to act than our gang. Vod threw his scalpels and then vanished in a cloud stinking of brimstone. They concluded the search of the laboratory eventually finding a secret door behind a life-sized chart of a human skeleton (ya, there was a reason it kept being pointed out as ‘life-sized’)… Additionally one of the cadavers wore an interesting multi-coloured belt. They took the belt and scalpels and egressed via the discovered portal. 

 

Another passage that just went that way for far too long without anything worth noting. Well until they heard the bleet of a goat or similar animal of burden. A light gently swaying, as if affixed to a pack animal, appeared and then a greeting, “ Ahoy you travelers of the fourth dimension how fair you?”. The caller sounded friendly enough and so he was engaged with pleasantries. Out of the darkness came a man of significant size and strategically placed whip, and strangely again limited clothing, leading a bighorn sheep laden with ceramic jars. He was Monster Honcho and made it immediately clear the jars on his sheep were definitely his. Everyone has their peculiarities I guess. He was friendly nevertheless, even when Boris grovelled for water. “Sorry chum nothing extra, grain for Gertie and Get-up-and-go-juice for good ol’Monster Honcho. I did just come from a chamber with a lake or pond or something. Gotta admit I didn’t look too close Gertie doesn’t like getting her hooves wet”. “Was it full of blood?! Did you see a pile of cloths?!”, an exhausted and exasperated Boris. “Don’t reckon whether it was blood, would not be surprised if it was the Fourth Dimension just doesn’t subscribe to convention if you know what I mean. The cloths hmm… we just might have seen that”. “Crap. Crap. Crap!”, exclaimed your pick of or maybe multiple hobos. They considered asking Honcho to join and then thought otherwise, “Well it was nice to meet ya big guy best of luck with your jars”. “Yes, my jars indeed. Keep on rolling little dudes and you to big fella. Just remember the jars are mine and the 4^thD behaves as it will”. They parted and not too long later the B-Team were once more standing on this side of the blood lake. 

This room smells like copper and salt. The ground here resembles a moon. It is difficult to move quickly through the various craters and boulders. The largest crater is filled with thick, viscous blood. There is a pile of clothing next to the lake but no sign of any people. 

“Well, let’s go”, came from the ever impatient Ramrod. Once more they were attacked midway across the lake. This time a singular ravenous giant blood bass leapt from the water attempting to gobble up Wendull’s face. Raul made quick work of the damn thing and they then pressed hard for the (not so) far-shore. This time they took the ‘other’ passage. 

 

It lead to a largish irregularly shaped chamber that was outlined with a line of salt. The walls are covered with crystals of all sizes and colors and emit a faint humming, in the middle of the chamber was a Crystal Sword. “Well, I would guess that is for keeping something in or something out”, posited Wendull. “Thanks Poindexter”, came from Rammer. “Step over it”, directed Boris. Once inside the humming crystal chamber Camillus was directed to pull the sword from the ground. She could not do it. Sloth followed up and yoinked the thing right out with ease. The sword began singing and Sloth began dancing as the rest of the gang searched the chamber without disturbing the salt ring. The outcome was nothing. They exited via a passage on the farside of the chamber. 

The marched except for Sloth whom pranced along waving his newly acquires singing crystal sword. This went on for 15 or so minutes until it got irritating (maybe someone even realized that it was an encounter magnet but I would not count on it). Boris directed a sack be placed over the sword. The singing was now somewhat muffled but Sloth still danced. They turned around and returned to the crystal chamber. “Sloth stick it back in the ground” “Aww Boris I like dancing” “I know big guy but we need to be sneaky right now, maybe we will come back for it when we feel better” “Ok”, Sloth nevertheless danced his way back to the centre of chamber and jammed the crystal sword into the slot with dramatic flourish. The singing stopped this allowed the mob to hear the groaning and weak scream whence they came. Some 40 or so feet back was a puddle of a man. The poor man’s body was stretching, melting, sizzling, and folding in upon itself. Next to him was an empty bottle. 

Baffled by this predicament they stood slack jawed watching the grotesque process.

 

                                                                                    

ROLECALL 

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 254688 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 356613 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)                         

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 157794 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 173261 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119090 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 23778 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 45526 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  83707 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  23914 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Ike the Duck (DF6) – AVATAR form.

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire – Cooking & Cleaning

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 33 days (from day 600)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (624) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Thirty-Six when we ask the questions:

What is going on with ‘puddle-man’?

How much longer can we go on without potable water?

Where did Vod go?

Why wouldn’t that stupid sword shut up?

What is and how did we get to this purported Forth Dimension?

Tale of the Tape

Location hex: ??dreamlands??

 

KILLS

Gladiators (4) 

Giant Blood Bass 

Doctor Vod (gone but not defeated) 

LOOT

Zilch.