Ascent of the Murder Goop (Session 241)

SESSION 241: I Put Jelly on My Steak.

Away, away from the island get all this the hell behind us and then something came from below.

 

Day 162 (Continued III -12.20/0605): At the last moment they decide against climbing out of the drink. It would not be long before the Histrix discover the destruction of their demonic deity and things would likely get nutty quick. Instead they dropped back down and took the presumed crab-lined (but red barnacle light) exit tunnel. They figured that this would be the fastest way back to the ship and it would end up that way. 

The tunnel twisted about for a couple hundred yards before arching upwards and terminating at the foot of a small shark ringed island. Ding-We figured this was the seal island north-west of the main island and where they were anchored. The mob of sharks showed little interest in our armour clad hobos as they trudged along the rocky ocean floor. Once getting to the main island it did not take long to find the anchored galleon. Bunny sent up the rope of climbing and the gang loaded up. Anchor was pulled, the main sail unfurled and oars were manned. All efforts were made to get some distance from this damnable place. The subterranean wind agreed. 

Day 163 (12.20/0605): The escape seemed to have worked the breeze maintained and residents of the briny deep were unobserved.

Day 164 (12.20/0605): The wind broke today and travel was greatly reduced. Not even the sea termites were biting.

Day 165 (12.20/0605): It was a gusty day along with Bimbles utilizing a water propulsion system (decanter endless water set on full blast) along with a summoned large sea-horse strapped to the prow the S.S. Albatross they were making good time back to the beach. 

Well until they came to an abrupt halt. 

They were beached! What? How? 

What luck, an island sized jelly-fish has dry-docked the expedition. 

What to do, what to do? 

 

An immense, pink-tinged, translucent mound of jelly-like substance abruptly creates an instant island from its emergence from the turquoise seawater, grounding all three ships. Hissing air and bubbles erupt from the water and massive, hairy tentacles float to the surface briefly before sinking once more into the sea. Water geysers jet 30’ high from craters spewing a salty spray that drenches most of the ship before briefly residing and revealing three cave-like entrances. The ‘caves’ on the surface of the monstrous jellyfish’s umbrella-shaped bell lead within the gelatinous mass (Malrex, along with the other italicized stuff below).

 

Time to explore. The gang disembarked and made their way to a random crater hole. The surface of the jellyfish’s bell was spongy, rubbery, and squished underfoot. The deeper indentations, or craters, held an ominous cave- like openings near the bottom that descended inside the gargantuan jellyfish. Remnants of seaweed floated just inside the cave’s surface as briny water flooded the tunnel. Things would get wet again. The first inspected crater appeared to drop nearly straight down the second had a more pleasant slide like appearance. Bunny once more brought forth her special rope and after quaffing water breathing doses they began the descent. The tunnel extended beyond the ropes reach so they did end up sliding their way into the first jelly-chamber. They slid into a nook, and bounced off the far “gelatinous wall”. There was a narrow passage to the SW and a more spacious passage to the NE that appeared to lead to a softly glowing chamber. The glowing chamber was selected over the narrow dark passage.

 

They came to the Sea Squirt Garden: Bio-luminescent water reveals an erupting palette of color from hundreds of sea squirts mixed with starfish attached to floors, walls, and ceiling. Fluorescent colors, electric blues, deep reds, and every other color of the rainbow creates a mesmerizing texture. 

A pale, gaunt humanoid creature exploded suddenly from a cluster of sea squirts, it’s sudden movement releasing a cloud from the squirts which created a hazy effect through the bio-luminescence. This thing was weird beyond being 7’ tall. It was a starfish head with starfish at the end of its creepy extended limbs. Let’s call it Gimpo. 

Carla stepped forward and attempted to communicate with Gimpo. Gimpo did not attack but it did wave about its creepy limbs. Carla kept talking and Gimpo kept having paroxysms until Steve realized that he was kinda getting the things point. Gimpo was using its neutral ‘alignment language’ and Stevie understood that lingo. Being fed questions from Carla our fighter was able to get have a broken conversation with Gimpo and come to the conclusion that resolution of their beached galleon would be found beyond the stomach which was that way and not through the gross flappy sphincter portal over there. Gimpo folded itself back into the sea squirt garden and our gang entered the stomach proper. 

 

The waters were slightly hazy with particles of partially digested things leisurely floating about.  The stomach was lit by faltering bio-luminescent clouds that sporadically light up portions of the huge cavern that appeared to likely be roughly circular with a big black pit in the middle. The ceiling was 25’-40’ above. The throat area (center) was completely dark, its interior descending downwards into an inky black abyss and lined with thousands of tiny, paralytic tentacles. There was an alcove of sorts to the left and seemed a good enough place to check out.

 

Stomach Lord: Numerous sponges and chunks of coral form a colorful kaleidoscope effect. The vibrant floor appears to be moving as hundreds of tiny crabs march across the brilliant landscape, hunting for food and flashing their minuscule claws.

Hidden in this mess of sea life was the gardener and lord of this place a gargantuan spider crab. It watched our hobos with its cold crustacean eyes. It’s pincher arms were over 30’ long and shot out attempting to grab a hobo meal. Dolec and Steve were able to raise their shields and deflect the attacks in the nick of time. The behemoth scuttled out of its lair and fell back into the darkness. Hobos pursued. Once more the pinchers shot out this time grabbing Steve in the vice like grip. He was able to break out using his impressive strength and the Rod of Lordly Might as a pry. The crab then scuttled into the tentacle laden throat of the jellyfish and attacked from the black hole. Steve had enough of this rubbish he an upcoming duke and wilderlands leader of the gourmandian arts he leapt into the black pit transforming the rod into a spear that he buried deep into the monster’s dorsal ganglion just after puncturing its thick shell between the eyestalks. 

That did the job. 

Now he was falling into the tentacle filled abyss atop a dead gargantuan crab, “How can I make a meal of this?” was his only words. 

They should have been “yikes, need a hand here”.

See ya later Stevie!

                                    

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 313941 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C9) 276643 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 289416 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 210405 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                        

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 463664 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 257448 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 176755 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 60920 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 59051 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 43871 xp +10% <64000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Captain Alamend Strender the Swashbuckler (F5) 25020 <32000> +5% CRTXXX

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 32 days (from day 600)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (630) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Forty-Two when we ask the questions:

Where is Steve falling to?

How do we get the ship off this damned thing?

What was up with the creepy starfish dude thing?

Will we ever see Gimpo again?

Tale of the Tape

Exploration Below the Blighted Sub-Hex

Location hex: 12.20

 

KILLS

Gargantuan Spider Crab 900

LOOT

Not yet.

The Strong Arm of the Abyss (Session 240)

SESSION 240: The Bubbly Brine of Blood 

The demonic forces were not done with our rag-tag band.

 

Day 162 (Continued II -12.20/0605): The swarm began to arrive, birthing from the three throbbing red portals. Fortunately demons do not understand ‘orderly’, the portals were choked with magnathas. Chaos for the log jam! So much so only one could squirm free of the logjam at each. This was very fortunate as fighting a lone octo-spider was challenging and three immediately began to gum up our group with their gelatinous cords. As the front-liners did their best to hold the line the spell casters went about dispelling the portals and successfully knocked out two. This resulted in only a single further magnaths escaping the Sanguine Fathoms. Just to keep the gang honest, all the racket had finally attracted the attention of Cassidy’s other bride – Luraina the Handmaiden. She entered the chamber without observation and silently slid her way towards Mason and Bimbles. She reached out with her tentacles at the two clerics. She hit Mason and he burned (Whomever knows fear burns at the touch of the Handmaiden, one could say but it seems dangerously close to infringement). His flesh bubbled and began to openly ooze out a purplish ichor. 

Luraina was a horrific creature appearing to be coddling a purplish sack. The bottom half is a bulbous dark ooze that slides across the seafloor, while the top half resembles a half-rotted female with several reddish barnacles clinging to her corpse. Her long hair dances in the water, her arms are purplish tentacles with three pronged claws; a silvery pendant around her neck is the only thing of beauty upon her. 

Mason had a deep feeling of dread that he was not far from becoming her ooze minion. Bimbles tried to turn her but she just laughed at his feeble display of devotion.

 

At the other end of the fight, Carla and Chorda were out of the fight as they had been wrapped up in sticky thread. The fighters however were getting their blows in. The third portal had been dispelled so it appeared to only be a matter of time until the magnathas were eradicated! Charles began ramping up his heroic deeps around now. Gaining advantage over the spid-octopi allowed Charles to charge, to the back, and smite the wretched oozing undead handmaiden of Abyzou. Luraina was able to melt Mason once more and the Captain’s weapon was fastly stuck to her slug-like lower body. Charles and Franz did not seem to care they were in for the game as she was a vile undead thing. Mason fell back holding his bubbling face. Back up front, Steve and Rhags finished up with the spidery abominations and turned their attention to getting Carla and Chorda out of their sticky situations. This gave Charles enough time to finish things as he sundered the Handmaiden of Abyzou. The battle complete. 

 

As the skin suit drifted abstractly through the blighted waters the gang turned their attention to the mirror. Standing like a monolith at the terminus of Ding-We’s parted water. It was the Dephizar Mirror the source of all contamination, a great mirror (10’ tall) surrounded by strange spined shells of whirling light blues, purples, and dappled with yellows and angry oranges. It was near perfect, except for a missing piece at the apex. Looking into it, was a coagulating sea of blood pushing against what was more window than mirror. He hobos deliberated. Chorda used this time to disappear, this would not be noticed until he was well and long gone. The horrific medallion found in Luvous’s sarcophagus likely was the perfect fit for the missing piece. They decided that reuniting the medallion with the mirror was totally the best thing to do (I said, “sure fill your boots…”). It was not the best thing to do. They came up with an indirect method of placing the missing piece using a pole and some of the sticky spid-octopus gunk. 

The portal was now open. 

Good job, prepare for your reward.  

Bubbles erupted from the shell spines and the mirror began to glow a brilliant yellow light. A chorus of twisted clicks, whistles and pulsed sounds, similar to an army of whales, reverberated throughout the chamber.

They were dumbfounded by the cacophony and the something crawled out. A demonic entity, stretched and slender with elongated limbs ending in thick serrated claws controlled by a frog-like head with a grizzly maw of broken glass. Nine feet tall it was and far faster than expected when its attention came to our hobos. Stepping into our world as its flesh ruptured releasing a tarry blood substance. It grinned in a grotesque way. Then it was upon the front line with supernatural speed. This was an unrelenting emissary of Chaos. Much like the Handmaiden this Farastu demodand was a sticky MoFo. It laid down some serious physical damage but it was not the first adversary that was grossly outnumbered by our hobo elite. 

Once more, it was just the gang and the mirror. Ding-We and Carla resorted to debate. Charles would commit his final heroic deed as the others blathered. He brought forth his shield and charged. Just before impact the Screaming Eagle shield let forth one more screech before being sundered as it obliterated the portal to the Sanguine Fathoms, “There we go. Now let’s loot this joint and get the hell out of here!”. The non-debaters gave a cheer and then they all got to work chipping out the spoils from the barnacle varnished walls and floor. The loot was good.

The treasure was quickly stowed away for later assessment as the hobos wanted to get the hell out of the water as soon as possible. They moved as quickly as they could back to the mess hall. The journey was completed. 

Back onto dry land, sure it was a tomb but it was currently mostly dry. 

The tide was coming. 

Next, they will make a run to their chamber of pictures to rest prior to getting the hell out of here. Destination the surface world.

Easier intended than done, you will see.

  

                                    

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 313941 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C9) 276643 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 289416 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 210405 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 463664 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 257448 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 176755 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 60920 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 59051 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 43871 xp +10% <64000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Captain Alamend Strender the Swashbuckler (F5) 25020 <32000> +5% CRTXXX

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 32 days (from day 600)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (630) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Forty-One when we ask the questions:

What about the jellyfish?

What about Abyzou’s minions?

Is our ship still intact?

What nightmares await us on the Sunless Sea?

Has anyone noticed just how repulse Marginal Mason has become?

Tale of the Tape

Exploration Below the Blighted Sub-Hex

Location hex: 12.20

 

KILLS

Magnatha (4) 

Luaina the Handmaiden 

Farastu (Tarry) Demodand  

LOOT

Silver locket infused with pearl and a platinum chain 2000 gp

10,347 cp - discarded

5,210 sp

3,225 gp

657 pp 

Pink pearl necklace (400 gp) 

two topaz gems (50 gp ea)

diamond (300 gp)

three pieces of jade (25 gp ea)

Suit of human-sized abalone shell armor (light, AC 5)

Sea Horse Statuette (magic)

Wand of Fireballs (8 charges)

Staff of Healing (23 charges)

Shield +2 that’s shaped like a crab

Potion of Invisibility

Ring of XXXXX

Spear +2 made entirely of a ensorcelled swordfish bill. 

Abyssal Waters (Session 239)

SESSION 239: The Source -- Getting Wet Beneath the Brine Lord's Tomb

The blood red waters await. At the end of the journey is Abyzou, demon lieutenant of the Sanguine Fathoms.

 

Day 162 (Continued 12.20/0605): It was finally time. The hobos were ready to make the plunge and it would be done via the flooded chamber east of the mess hall. The hike was smooth and easy. Readied with potions, kelp bladders and magic. They descended the steps into the chamber until the front line stood before the waters edge. Here goes nothing.

They dropped into the hazy red waters. Most certainly Abyzou’s zone of influence. It was in fact the lair of a magnatha, a gross amalgam of octopus and spider infused with a healthy demonic influence. The thing was currently elsewhere, not far but keenly aware of the murderhobo presence. Our goobers were having a tough time seeing mush in the hazy waters. They did notice something wiggling in the back of the chamber but decided to investigate the larger of two corridors behind them instead. All surfaces of this aquatic world were treacherous. Covered in Abyssal barnacles secreting their vile shellac entombing all other life, it was a marine graveyard. Travel was painfully slow. About 30 minutes later it attacked. Resembling an 8’ long, part spider/part octopus creatures from the Sanguine Fathoms dimension with a heard covered in transparent skin, revealing sparkly veins and flashes of synapses, like a mini-universe. Eight spindly, 3’ long legs near its head spin a sticky gelatinous cord that is dragged by it’s legs. The magnatha attacked. 

The aquatic realm was clearly its home and our gang were at a disadvantage, at least they had a numeric advantage. The demonoid worked from the shadows just beyond observation and reach of the hobos. Tossing sticky threads and blood hungry barnacles. Steve eventually used his free movement to engage the abomination and entangled it in a melee that it would not survive.

 

The hazy waters of the Sanguine Fathoms had waned so they turned around to return to the original chamber. Returning, this time they actually investigated the chamber. The movement had been caused by a Histrix that had been embedded into the wall with spider-thing webbing and barnacle shellac. It used telepathy to plead for its life, “Release me. Kill demon. Revenge. Kill demon. Help you. Free me!”. Lucky for the evil seahorse-man, Chorda, the mob suspected they needed as much help as they could raise. “Deeper into the blood waters. Must go”, Chorda gestured to the two corridors going southward. The gang choose the southwesterly one. No comment came from the Histrix whom fell into the back of the line. The tunnel went aways until forking they turned hard south and came to a larger barnacle laden chamber. Dead and dying creatures affixed in cruor barnacle cementation. “Close now. Go deeper”, was Chorda’s contribution. The waters were good and hazy now. Another passage at the back of the chamber led closer to the final destination. It was absolutely choked with abyssal barnacles slowing movement even further to avoid setting the things off. It took a half hour before they successfully navigated the passage. It opened into a large chamber, they had to take Chorda’s word for this because visibility was markedly limited,red barnacles cling to every rock surface, expelling their gooey slime across bones of their victims (sea life and several histrix bones) and releasing their bloody concoction into the water

. A cacophony of clicks and muted growls reverberated through the waters of the chamber. “We here. It here too. Maybe others”, Chorda readied his spear. 

They moved closer. 

A string of bubbles appears ahead, generated by hundreds of tiny limbs rapidly molding the slimy barnacle goo into some sort of translucent giant-sized skin suit. The tiny limbs were just a portion of the abomination that was Abyzou. It was like a cross between clam- worm, seahorse, with spider-like components haphazardly affixed. The limbs seemed to grow larger, smaller, increase in number or decrease as the creature worked. Two histrix worked beside it, and beyond them, was a great mirror (10’ tall) strongly radiating whirling colours of light blues, purples, and dappled with yellows and angry oranges. 

The she-demon reared up with the interruption making an unnerving trumpeting noise revealing a mouth on a long snout and a second maw of jagged death that exploded from her torso. The Histrix brought forth tridents and moved to attack. There would be no negotiation. Ding-We had a trick or two up his sleeve. The first was to haste mighty Dolec as Steve largely unimpeded due to his armor of free action. The Histrix swung in along the sides looking to pierce the softer hobos behind the tanks as Abyzou fell back committing to Abyssal magics to call forth what was presumed to be three portals of glowing blood red. Steve’s advance was slowed by the treacherous rough terrain of the barnacle encrusted floor. Rhags and Dolec did their best to keep up (10’ behind). The demon continued its ritualistic magic allowing Ding-We to pull his second trick – part water. Producing a water free channel straight to the demon. This allowed the three tanks, and Chorda whom had swum behind the enemy, to get into melee with Abyzou. The Histrix servants were not faring well as Bunny and Captain Alamend provided support for the clerics. Abyzou opened up like hell (or a bloody abyssal abyss) came to earth. Clawed arms exploded from its body buffeting her four attackers and then followed up with a paralyzing bite upon the hasty Dolec and then attempted to swallow Rhags with its colossal torso mouth. Dolec was dropped but Rhags was able to keep his shield in pace to prevent being consumed. Following this Evelyn the Lure made her presence known as she sang an enchanting rhythmic diddy. 

A shapely dark-haired woman wearing a sea shell crown and a flowing pure white nightgown. Only when angry does her face contort to rage revealing pointy sharp teeth, long nails, and flesh rot. Her hair sways wildly about her face as if it has a mind of its own. Sha was clearly angry and very ugly. 

                         

Bimbles and the Captain complied with the mesmerizing and dropped to the ground. Carla and Bunny turned to deal with Evelyn. Her timing was not perfect if she wanted to support her team as Steve and Rhags to sacrifice defence to deal as much damage as possible to the demoness. The gambit worked Abyzou dissolved into reddish black cloud before simply disappearing. Steve turned around and charged the rotting lady known as the Lure. She gave him a potent punch in the throat draining him of vitality before his counter sundered the wretched creature.

They all grabbed one breath before the portal things started strobing and releasing deep rhythmic notes. Things were coming forth and they have tentacles and spider-like legs – more magnatha were coming. 

And they thought the first one was bad enough, here comes a whole bunch…

 

                                    

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 313941 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C9) 276643 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 289416 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 210405 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth  

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 254664 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 356589 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)                         

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 463664 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 257448 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 157770 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 176755 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 173249 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 109599 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 101166 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119078 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 64817 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Felix Ignatius Hemlock the once skeletal Sleuth (I7) 47017 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 60920 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 59051 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 23766 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 45514 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 43871 xp +10% <64000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  83695 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  23902<40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 103411 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

Captain Alamend Strender the Swashbuckler (F5) 25020 <32000> +5% CRTXXX

Ike the Duck (DF6) – AVATAR form.

Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire 

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 32 days (from day 600)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (630) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Forty when we ask the questions:

Will the octo-spiders actually be the death of us?

What/ how do we deal with the mirror?

If we somehow survive the above challenges do we just run as fast as fucking possible back to the surface?

Tale of the Tape

Exploration Below the Blighted Sub-Hex

Location hex: 12.20

 

KILLS

Barnacles (19) 

Mananthra 

Histrix Servants of the Blood Demon (2) 

The Lure 

Abyzou Demon Lieutenant Third rank of the Sanguine Fathoms

LOOT

None aside from dead fish

Out of the Worm, Back in the Pink Goo (Session 238)

SESSION 238: Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. 11 – Lost in the 4^th Dimension – Out of the Worm and into the Pink Goo

Finding a hole in the worm we find ourselves once more above ground facing a preposterous thing.

 

Day 184  Continued - Status normal: water supply – full 248 pints; Food – none

They were still slow to move from the zombie meadow. Boris and Camillus both ate another chunk of the mystery medicinal meat. Boris then wandered across the chamber poking at zombie corpses and grumbling about something. The rest of the group seemed satisfied not making a rush either this way, that way or back the way. Herb happily grazed during this time and Katre reconfirmed her preference to return to the “Scorn Lands”. She clarified that she had entered the Space Worm via it’s maw and that her home was not atop the plateau from which our gaggle had entered the damnable thing. By this time Boris had finished doing whatever he had been up to, “Let’s go that way grumble grumble grumble”. And so they did. We called that choice ‘north’ just for ease. Nobody not even the direction sensing duck had any source of orientation in this weird place. The passage lead to a sphincter door. Boris peaked into a dark chamber that smelled of faintly of burnt reed and wood smoke. “Have we stunk this stink before?”, was the dwarf’s inquiry. No one could remember for sure, so they decided to go back to the meadow and take the other passage. Sloth danced them back letting his singing sword set the techno-rhythm. 

 

A few minutes down the ‘south’ corridor they ran afoul of another grotesque demon that had been slave driving a gross of pathetic imps cautiously carrying unknown covered bundles. The demon boss, as I said was gross, was a deranged creature whose snake-like head is covered with a crest and moist, dripping mouth. Its short, broad crab-like torso is covered in gangrenous-smelling yellowish slimy skin. Its grotesque ridged back is met by membranous wings and extends down to a horrible serpentine tail. It hiss-barked a command to its imps and then took to the air and came at our flat-footed murder-dummies. It showed a resilience against magic and an ability to suck up damage but its physical attacks were having limited effect. Let us just say that is was more a matter of the dice gods favouring the dweebs at this very moment. Willy was teleported by Agolloch just above and behind the abomination, Agolloch, whom enjoys ‘Screaming for Vengeance’ spilt the thing in half. They made immediate pursuit of the imps. This was when illumination and encumbrance showed up to be limiting factors. The imps were briefly seen by Ramrod and Willy before disappearing. The rest of the gang caught up with the two thieves standing before another chamber. 

It was dead silent, like unusually so. Inside, The ceiling was very high, incongruously high. Stalactites stretch down and on the floor stalagmites point up. Some are six feet long and deadly sharp. Water dripped ceaselessly but made no sound. For some reason they gave up on the imp chase and decided to exhaustively search the chamber. Raul levitated into the inky blackness and examine the upper extent while the rest of the gang chose 10’ square areas along the walls on the ground. After 20 or so minutes nothing was found. Raul was not ready to give up for another reason that was unknown. Forty minutes later the mega-dungeon explorers exploration efforts paid off.

Raul had discovered a tunnel hidden up in the darkness. Something(s) had dug into the corpse of the Space Worm. Reporting back, it was decided that they would take this hole out. They setup te rope of climbing, put Herb to sleep and went about the process of getting everybody and everything into the fair (man) sized hole. Examining the hole the two dwarves received Sasha’s approval when the stated that it appeared to have been dug by many small claw-like hands. Katre was optimistic but did not share this fact - damn elves so aloof. The tunnel was certainly tilted upwards. They trudged along for an hour or so until they came to a junction that housed an outpost for some sort of bizarre head-like race of beings. “Keldrane! I am home”, was Katre exclamation. The rest of the gang was more of “what the hell are these?”. “Are those human heads?”, was Boris’s somewhat baffling statement. “The Kaldane are a race of large, sexless, humanoid heads that crawl around in tunnels via their six long insect-like appendages. 

Considerably weak on their own, the Kandane have adapted a strange symbiotic relationship with the headless Rykor…”, Katre’s exposition was interrupted by the head-things talking at us. “You have successfully traversed our tunnel and have reached the toll station. Either return from where you came or pay us a ransom of 250 golden coins!” “What are you pirates!?!”, was Rammers unthought complaint. Raul stepped forth, “Don’t mind him he is badly cloned” and proffered the merger toll without concern. The creatures began to fall back to the adjacent passage from where they came. “Hey can we go that way?” “No, you may not. Go that way, back to the surface where you belong”. Raul had one more play, “could we rest beside your camp? Perhaps, for a modest fee? And maybe get dinner with that?”, he was feeling a little tired and Wendull certainly looked it. “We could allow you to rest in yonder alcove for a protection fee and provide each with two sustenance cubes. 250 golden sheckles per eight  hours or portion. Pay up or push off stuck heads!”. 

Raul easily found another 250 coins. One of the heads took payment while another lead the gang to an alcove a scant 50’ down the passage. “What the hell are these? This ain’t meat!”, Boris on the verge of anger after receiving the rations. “Those are sustenance cubes. That means food. We call it tofu. It will most likely make you a weirdo progressive, or gay if your lucky”. “Like we will notice the difference”, Camillus stealing a line opportunity while taking her squishy square from Raul. He missed the nuance but Willy got it “hehe”. Willy was making the most of his time being in charge of his own actions as Agolloch waited for the forces of Chaos to rear their heads. Wendull then took his chance to make a social statement while pulling up his socks, “You know that you folks are very trying for modern audiences”. “Shut up dork!”, Camillus pointing to her steel boot and preventing any more placating of children. “Hoyvin-Glavin!” was Wendull’s final statement for some time.

 

Day 185 - Status normal: water supply – 148 pints (8p/person+12 for Herb); Food – one day

They rested unmolested and all except Boris awoke feeling fairly fresh, maybe it was the incessant techno mumbo gumbo from Sloth’s sword. They never even contemplated a double cross by these creepy spider heads. They were given fair warning that their time in the Kelrane territory was waning, “Either go to the surface or pay us to go back to the dead worm”. “All cool little grovers we desire the sun’s rays once more”, was Raul’s signoff. “Grrr”, Camillus thought she was finally going to get a line but instead marched off up the passage. 

 

This tunnel was different. It was natural. Probably an erosional feature concurred the two bearded half-pints. “I guess we should have seen that coming when they didn’t toll us”, was Gurn’s observation. The tunnel crept ever upwards and was soggy at times but after a couple of hours the end came with natural light and not a hook horror nest as I had hoped. The hole egressed into the back end of a valley contained by near vertical rocky walls extending hundreds of feet. The valley quickly widened to slightly more than six miles in diameter. It was at this point there was the most unusual of plugs. It was something or a thing or something else. It had crab-like legs the size of a wizard’s tower that connected to a body or structure that was of unnatural shape, perhaps hexagonal. The legs connected to a porous meaty like structure which held the shell/ body/ casing. Atop of the upper structure a pink forest and a number of rocky structures could be seen. Katre was certain that this was not her homelands. “Well, it should be obvious to even the most dim-witted individual who holds an advanced degree in hyperbolic topology, FLAVIN, that we have stumbled into...the third dimension from the fourth only one more to go”, Wendull dropping the fact bombs. They approached the immobile colossus. They got about ¼ mile away. Then the thing shot out a horde of vacuum tubes, really big of course, and they simply sucked up our B-Team. 

The ride was not all that unpleasant, kinda like a reverse waterslide ride. You get bounced around but end up with only a few minor abrasions. Then they were shot out somewhere on the surface of the thing into a mildly acidic lake of pink goo. It probably fair to say ‘digestive juices’. Since our lot, including the murder-mule Herb, are made of tough stuff nobody would succumb to being hex-crab-thing food. They collected their goods and waded their way out taking only minimal digestive damage. Getting to shore they cleaned the goop off as well as they could and then took a look around. 

They appeared to be in the NE corner of the thing. To the W, what appeared to be a village like eruption was a couple of miles away across a coarse wasteland. To the south was the pink forest spanning almost the entirety of the other half of the hex until it ran into a series of rocky outcroppings in the SW sector. 

 

“Ya’know what bubs, I think maybe just maybe we could be back in the Dreamlands. All this -Wagh- digestive pink goop made me think of a story I once over heard in a pub in Atthra. Drunken fools until you get sucked up the pipes of a city-sized walking hex. This walking calamity is also known as the Hex-Crawler”.

 

“Let’s go to the village, I’m getting hangry”, They fell into line with Boris.

 

ROLECALL 

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 262984 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Electrical Dwarven Lord (D9) 364909 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Major Corruption: Crackles with electrical energy              

Ramrod the Cloned Thief! (T9) 172090 xp +5% <280001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 177408 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 123237 xp +0% <150000> CRT 1d20/IV

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 27925 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 49673 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  87854 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  28061 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Ike the Duck (DF6) – AVATAR

Katre the Elf-Girl (E3) 8114 xp <XXXX> +0% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire – Cooking & Cleaning

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 33 days (from group A)

Elapsed Campaign Time

604 (629) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Thirty-Nine when we ask the questions:

What is this itch bugging Boris?

What is this titanic hex crab thing?

Where are we?

Tale of the Tape

Location hex: ??dreamlands??4^th Dimension??Somewhere else??

Raul is now the proud owner of Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation 

Lady Versamage’s bones travel along inside a sack

 

KILLS

Demonic Supervisor 

LOOT

None