Screw you and your Ectoplasm & Another Stupid Story (Session 345)

SESSION 345: The Rats have a Bolt Hole & Oh, this is Something New ain’t it?* 

This combo plate of two short sessions finds trouble, portents missed, big trouble, bigger escape and then then the unknown. The finer details of such somewhat scrambled…

 

Day 863 Continued (Dry Gulch): Back to the tower of wizardry they marched with the three captives. Once Suzie reported back to Master Thyber he had the Guild of Silence show up in sort order and take the brigands to holding. Someone was fixated on ensuring the ethical treatment of the baddies. Why? We ain’t really sure. Nevertheless the Secret Service agents agreed not to kill or leave them permanently crippled. 

They then went off to find the house from which the Red Foot’s were operating.

Wow, it was like right there, under everyone’s nose kitty-corner from the guild of swords house. BoB figured the obfuscated entry and enter they did. Charles and Dolec almost fell into the floorless joint but both stopped on the correct dime. 

A little work later a bunch of them had descended the thirty feet down into the undercity. Charles opened the far door triggering a trap that resulted in a minor failure of rocky materials around the door frame. Beyond was the brigands supply chamber and a passage that went further into the unknown. 

Interesting. 

The day was now getting and Dolec and Suzie had not done any you-know-whating for a while. “Shut it down. We is gonna check in with the Bosses and get some relaxing in”, Dolec hollered as Biff gave him a knowing punch in the spine. There was some attempt to curry favour with the council that evening but it seemed that they had their own priorities our hobos just weren’t all that special.

 

Day 864 (Under Dry Gulch): Once more creeping towards the upper pit hub zone as they entered from the house rather than the tower. In the long passage from the house area they encountered a lone individual, whom used a light stone to obscure his identity. It was a Guild of Silence member, the Master in fact. He was cagey about revealing anything and disappeared shortly after, “Take a snack before continuing”. 

After the short rest they pressed on back to the secret door that hid this particular passage. They hung a quick turn and threw a bunch of flaming oil into the trapped mold chamber. They next decided to return to the sewers via the pit trap. 

Making their way from the big pool to the other pool on their way to the scribe area we had another great ambush. The thing, a floating beaked brain with tentacles grabbed Biff.  

The tentacles must have been covered in a paralytic as Biff stopped struggling almost immediately. It began to float away with its meal. Charles, Dolec and BoB pursued it hard trying to prevent it from getting away. The brain sought solstice from attack overtop the settling pool. BoB is more than just a silent ninja she is a missile-murderess and popped the brain thing. Its lifeless body fell into the pool and immediately released the paralyzed Biff whom sunk like a brick. “Oh Oh…”. Fortunately, someone had a water breathing potion that resolved the problem. During this time Suzie collected samples from the corpse. Dolec could foresee the evening’s time with his gal pal being usurped for research…

Eventually returning to the scribe/ librarian quarters. There were two areas left to investigate. The first lead to a kitchen still occupied by its staff, the three of which were now very much undead. Eat sword death chefs!

The second was atop a near vertical thirty foot stairwell that ended at the backside of a false wall. Charles used Franz’s x-ray vision power to scan beyond the wall. The sword saw what appeared to be a library, a room with lots of book cases. One of the book cases, conveniently, the one on the other side of the secret door had fallen ages passed and appeared to have crushed someone underneath. Wimpy book keeper. Dolec and Chung-Li attempted to deliberate but the unseen spirit of a one-legged wizard pushed them forward – “Nothing to be concerned about. Go Go Go!” Dolec pulled open the door.

 

Day 864* Continued (Under Dry Gulch & Beyond): The gang pushed into the lost library over or around the toppled bookcase and scrunched skeleton. As their eyes panned around the chamber a deep coldness began to rapidly coalesce. Dolec, now a fellow with a gal and a seasoned murderhobo, had a sinking feeling of dread, “Run! Red alert! Escape!”. 

No one questioned him they just started jumping into the near vertical stairwell injuries be damned. Above and behind came an unworldly scream. The, likely, effects of which they had avoided in the barest of moments. 

“Time to get the hell out of here?”, Chung-Li looking towards Dolec as he arose to his knees from the hobo pile. 

“Ya. That was something wicked and we’re just screwin’ about”, Dolec stated calmly NEARLY pulling the plug on this almost catastrophic day.

“Hey, why don’t we check out the caverns?”

“Hmmm couldn’t be worse than whatever undead spirit that was rising there”.

“Nope. Tots better stuff coming”.

The group made there way back to the big pool then back up the trap hole and then down the passage they had been previously ambushed that lead to the Red Foot encampment. 

Something was amiss.

The spiked door was no longer open, once more magically sealed. 

One of the irons lay on the floor giving no hint to the cause of failure. Kat ‘knocked’ the door once more and they began pouring into the house hole chamber. It seems that the likely cause of the door spike failure was caused by another horde of hook horrors. 

Fighting ensued. 

 

Day 865* (Under Dry Gulch & Beyond): The gang not getting any special treatment from the council snuck into the abandoned house and down into the underworld. It was time to find out where that passage beyond the Red Foot’s supply depot would lead us.

 

Team UG (you figure it out): Dolec, Chung-Li, Biff, BoB, Katre, Charles, Suzie Hotpants & introducing Gord  

 

ROLECALL (Bosses in Training)

 

Dolec Da the Hero (F7) 89577 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Chung-Li the Elven Champion Sorcerer (E7) 144942 xp <250000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO8) 130990 <MAX> +5% CRT 1d14/II

‘BOB’ the Unseen (N8) 92871 <180000> +5% CRT 1d20/II

Charles in Charge the Champion (F7) 95265 <120000> +10% CRT 1d20/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Katre Elf-Girl and Swordsman Conjuror (E4) 19223 xp <32000> +0% CRT 1d8/II

Gord the Scout (R3) 7351 xp <10000> +10% CRT 1d14/III

Suzie Hotpants the Theurgist (MU4) XXXX xp <XXXX>  10% CRT 1dXXX/I

 

RESERVES (Death Recovery) 

Ramrod the Cloned Thief - Recovering from death (yet again) 846 start (876)

Bimbles of the now creepy electrical eyes– Freshly not dead (881). 

Raul of more facial scars (-2 CHA) – no longer mostly dead (866)

Herbert the Gnome - no longer dead (867)

Elapsed Campaign Time

870 – Everyone Else for reasons.

863 – Carla-Team (at Dry Gulch)   

Domain Days

Gormandia: 25 (Start 838)

Bunnland:?

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Forty-Six when we ask the questions:

What’s down this way?

Will we find out why there is so many hook horrors?

Why doesn’t the council love us, we have been here for a week we are hardly strangers?!?

Tale of the Tape

Nope, they escaped an almost certain carnage…

KILLS

Yellow mold (3) 

Grell 

Corpse Coffer Head Chef & Zombie Sous Chefs 

Hook Horrors (8) 

LOOT

300 gp

8000 cp – Donated to Horse Lord 

Gems (6): 10,500,500,50,100,500= 1660 gp

Emerald of distinction 500 gp

Just Another Day with the Green Kill Team (Session 305)

SESSION 305: The Green Solution 

Enough mucking about it was troll smashing time.

 

Day 270 Continued II (Dwarven outpost): For what seemed like weeks the team mulled their next move. The dithering finally ended when Biff asked the simple question, “Why ain’t we murdering and looting?”. Some defensive preparations and a flying wizard later they moved into the smoky throne room. The trolls were still deep in some sort of debate facilitating a hobo sneak attack. Mason began with a prayer to Yrrg as others quaffed and conducted final preparatory actions. Ding-We flew into the upper shadows of the chamber as the rest slunk into the smoky chamber that obfuscated their scent from the normally olfactory excellent trolls. Ding-We started the party by releasing a cone of cold upon the trolls that milled about in front of the leader filled throne as the tanks streamed around the side of the throne.  A whole bunch of Chung-Li’s filled in the back ranks. 

 

The fight was on. After the flat-footed start the trolls yelled out an alarm. The chieftain leaped from his throne to face the far wing of intruders the champion moving on the other side of the throne. The chief was an interesting beast prominently “wearing” some fine human-sized chainmail. One side of his face also bore distinct burn marks that likely were of murderhobo origin, he flew into a rage once he set eyes on Ding-We and Steve. The cone of cold seemed to be a bit of a dud with the trolls quickly regenerating out of the flash freezing. The trolls were in a feral state. Slashing vile claws then following up with broken glass biting maws. More trolls streamed into the chamber from the far double doors. The throne prevented the trolls from surrounding the gang and helped the two wizards drop some area of effect attacks allowing maximal targets and avoiding friendly fire. With both Rhags and Steve wielding flaming brands the gross green guys had their key defence (regeneration) neutralized. The tanks were taking their lumps and the multitude of Chung-Li’s were slowly but surely diminishing to the source wizard as Biff and BoB launched missile attacks. The trolls began to drop allowing Mason to oil up and ignite the bodies, preventing any return visits. 

Dead. Dead. Dead.

Blades were cleaned and mason provided aid to the bashed up front-liners. Once again we moved to soldier’s pay. There was a reasonable amount of coin and some real nice decorative platinum swords, two troll porn amethyst cylinders along with the boss’s armour and a ring set with a rune surrounded fire agate. They knew this was the good stuff. There were a few tears also shed as a number of delicate items were obliterated during the battle. They moved forward through the now open double doors. 

This lead to a guard chamber that housed another four trolls whom were quickly dispatched. They deserved it as the vile creatures were using a masterwork thief’s tool as a communal toothpick – yuck. It would need a good cleaning before getting to business. That was the end of the troll lair. The gang was a little beat up and getting laden in loot. They decided to fall back to the hydra silver pile and pack out as much as possible. They found a way to get it all without resorting to crawling. 

They left the dungeon. The trip back to camp had an unusual and unwanted encounter. A dozen giant wasps angry and well out of season. Something must have disturbed their Winter hibernation. The bugs wanted revenge on an unknown perpetrator. The hobos fit the bill. The insects proved to be cautionary opponents. Ding-We was paralyzed and had to be dragged back to camp to await Mason recharging his holy touch.

For once they all agreed with the wizard and settled in for a night’s rest. Sometimes having a garrison makes camping just a bit more restful.   

 

 

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 339875 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 247098 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth  

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 280600 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.                         

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 529123 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 109529 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 71726 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 84859 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 109721 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

743b days at beginning of session (Boris & Friends just outside of Liwil)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

711d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Six when we ask the questions:

What next? 

Back in and down the final corridor or something else?

Tale of the Tape

Nothing to speak of

KILLS

Troll chieftain 

Troll Champion 

Trolls (11) 

Giant wasps (12) 

LOOT

10,000 ep

5,000 sp

Ornate platinum swords (2) 1600 gp each

+3 chainmail (in need of repair)

Ring of Fire Resistance 

Amethyst Cylinders of inscribed troll porn (2) 1200 gp each

Masterwork Thieves Tools (1600 gp)

Beating Those We Despise (Session 304)

SESSION 304: Wandering Mayhem 

The dungeon hates you and punishes those in it’s corridors.

 

Day 270 Continued (Dwarven outpost): The other chest was mundane. Rhags smashed it nonetheless with his Warhammer. Spilling forth thousands of coins and a couple now busted items. They realized that carrying capacity was a limiting factor. A few handfuls of the electrum portion were grabbed but the rest would have to wait. After a brief rest they moved further down the corridor. Coming to a door and a passage descending into darkness. They were about to choose the door but the dungeon had other ideas. Biff elected to shine his lantern back down the corridor at the right time. He caught shadows. Moving. With many legs. On the ceiling. 

Creeping silent as death a host of giant crab spiders. 

They were not surprised but still the arachnids were able to drop into their midst. 

Their job was to distract from the second line and they succeeded. 

As our gang engaged the attackers a pair of half spider half man things charged the line. 

The spiders did their job of interrupting spellcasting as the man-spiders attempted to break down the front-line. The battle raged for longer than expected. The deep dwellers could not gain the upper hand. Man-o-man did we try…One by one spidery opponents began to fall and then there was none.

The freaks were kind enough to be carrying a bunch of gems. Reasonable pay was the consensus.

Returning to the door Rhags cautiously opened it. They were at the backend of a dimly lit musky and smoky chamber. He could see the backside of a throne upon a podium and deep guttural voices. The sources unseen. Quickly dimming their lights they fell back quietly closing the door. 

Round one of deliberations.

Many things were proposed a single operation engaged.

BoB, silent as death, crept into the chamber. Scaling the back wall and then blending into the darkness of the shadowy ceiling 20’ up. She was able to observe the working of the throne room. It was trolls. A boss in the throne along with a champion and four mooks. Whatever they were discussing was gibberish to her ears. Falling back she did her silent best to describe the situation to the gang. Once it was all done even Steve realized it was preposterous that she had no writing implements, “Why doesn’t she even have a stick of chalk? She does not talk for crying out loud!”. 

Round two of deliberations.

Almost something, but nope.

Round three of deliberations

Maybe, we shall find out soon…

 

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 339875 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 247098 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth         

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 529123 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

 

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 109529 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 71726 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 84859 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 109721 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

743b days at beginning of session (Boris & Friends just outside of Liwil)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

711d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Five when we ask the questions:

How are we going to address this gross of trolls?

Where does that passage lead?

Is it almost time for more random mayhem?

What are those trolls talking about?

How much loot are we going to leave behind?

How did we ever get rich?

Once again, how deep is this dungeon?

Tale of the Tape

No ticker today… Well we did learn that smashing things can wreck the contents therein. Maybe that is something.

BoB also continues to have challenges firing missiles into melee. Rhag’s ass really is becoming a pin cushion.

KILLS

Giant Crab Spiders (6) 

Driders (4) 

LOOT

xxxx sp awaiting collection

xxxx ep awaiting collection

Gems (8): 2810

Whacking Day Continues (Session 301)

SESSION 301:  The Loot Keeper 

There was the treasure they just needed to get past the guardian.

 

Day 267 Continued III (15.23 The below defiled Dwarven outpost): Beyond the fireplace door was a document room. It held treasure and a worrisome skin-map. Oh, also sitting upon the interior lintel was the guard “dog”. Well it would have been a dog if the bad guys had been brigands or something similar but this was an Ophidian lair so it was a skeletal naga instead. 

As Steve and Rhags (behind a tossed in light stone – thanks BoB!) entered the large hidden chamber the fighter’s spider-sense went off and foiled what I thought was a well set trap. Looking up the two tanks say a trio of fifteen foot snake bones topped with a hideous humanoid skull moving onto the ceiling. 

Stevie’s warning provided Ding-We, who was in the fireplace before the door to blast the chamber with a shot of undead mucking up radiance. The fighters then held the creature at bay as the wizard conjured up a lesser anti-magic shell for himself and those around him. Steve and Rhags fell back to enjoy the protection. The trio of snake-bones had queued up magic missiles (three each). It turned out that only three were real. “Mirror images” was shouted by someone other than BoB. The number of real missiles didn’t really matter as the magical barrier put an end to them. The serpent wasn’t a dummy, just dead, it sealed the hobos out with a thick and sticky web. 

This would provide some time to reassess how to deliver it duty of ‘kill all intruders’.

Steve activated his flamebrand but it would take some time allowing the dead naga some time to prepare. It moved back onto the lintel above the tanks and covered the chamber in darkness and silence. Busting through the webs hobos began rolling into the chamber once more. The darkness was quickly countered by the wizard but the silence lingered and was a limiting factor. The naga thanked the wizard by tagging him with its paralytic tail stinger. For a second serving it bit Steve brutally causing his flesh to turn black and begin to rot. The creature could not use any more of its potent magics due to the anti-magic so it attacked from distance from the ceiling as it spider squiggled about. The snake saw the wizard and cleric as glowing icons that must be destroyed even when rotting Steve was a bone breaking problem. 

Meanwhile Rhags bounced about. Poor little gaffer just couldn’t get to the fight. The anti-magic shell persisted, even as the fight dragged on. It became a game of attrition and the singular bunch of bones was going against an ofttimes effective murderhobo squad. Rhags finally got a hit in as he leapt from the mantle and finally smashed the thing to bits with his spear. 

Bone bits rained down but our gang were all business. Straight to the four large chests (10,000 coin capacity ~150 lbs). They did not appear to be locked nor did they glow under the scrutiny of Mason’s detect traps invocation. There were glorious contents in three of them. Rhagnar did not like what he saw and went to the empty chest and stuck his big dwarf snoz in and gave a deep wiff, “Dag nab-it! There was even more loot in here. Smells like gold and platinum residue” raged the Dwarf. There was some coin and a few items but the big take away was gems and jewelry. The jewelry was most certainly sourced from many years of human and adjacent races facing the atrocities delivered by the ever wicked snake-men. The wall hanging ‘map’ across the room providing clear evidence of such. It was clearly, very evidently, made from four human skins tanned, stretched and stitched together with great skill. Chung-Li, Ding-We and Mason stood before it taking in the details as the others rooted through the treasure.  

The map showed the local lands and it was up to date. Including our hobo activities as well other human, dwarf, elf and stirgi settlements spanning east and west of the blood river. Along with this there were many notes in the black language of the ophidians. Ding-We held in his concern as he directed Biff to roll it up and stuff it in his troll-head-of-holding. “I was keeping my lunch in there now yer gonna get human flakes on my peanut butter”, grumbled the blackguard as he rolled and stuffed. The wizard missed the quip as he dwelled in his thoughts, the map appeared to contain many worrisome artifacts of their activities and likely evidence that these serpent-men were more like a hydra than he would like to know. The ophidians want two things to destroy man and enslave the rest. 

After inventorying the loot the chests were reloaded and readied for transit. They were mostly convinced that a tactical retreat was the next step. We shall see what actually happens.

   Stevie receiving a headful of necrotic anti-life.

 

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 335303 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 242526 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                       

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 524551 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 107243 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 69440 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 82573 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 107435 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

(733b) days at beginning of session (Far Southern Basilisk Hills)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

708d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Two when we ask the questions:

Is this secret chamber a good place to rest or are we leaving?

What about those southern passages (3)?

What would the smart decision be?

Are there more snakes?

Why do the snakes have so much information?

Didn’t we thwart the serpent invasion once already?

Tale of the Tape

Steve was afflicted with a horrid rotting fortunately a Lama of Yrrg was on hand.

KILLS

Skeletal Naga 

LOOT

3000 sp

1000 gp

Gems (30): 5,810 gp

Jewelry (22): 22,500 gp

Potion of Speed

Scroll: Protection from Elementals

Sword +1 Dwarven origin

 

63,000 sp (which has been piled for later collection no xp yet, still unclaimed)

C'mon Now, How Many Heads Do You Really Need? (Session 298)

SESSION 298:  THE AWOKEN or The Thing Over There

We gonna run. Nope we is the MurderHobos. The sleeper be damned.

 

Day 267 (14.23à15.23): They had the moment, the monstrous entity seemed to need a moment to shake off the sleep. The wizard flopped all over the place before calling the retreat. The creature could be anything, even a dragon or another dwarf released Balrog, and a breath attack could be calamitous. 

 

Back up the stairs they ran. Then Ding-We changed his mind again, “Let’s hold here”. Perhaps facilliated by the in action reminder that running with a peg-leg ain’t competition level.

The party straddled the archway separating the corridor from the chamber. The beast, no it was an abomination, leapt across the pool and landing nearly at the stairwell. It was about twenty feet long and stood nearly as high. A reptilian horror a twisted hydra a great maw lined with numerous rows of teeth going deep into its throat. To top this off the gigantic mouth hole was ringed by eight great serpents that lashed out a good fifteen feet from the main body. And to put a cherry on top it had a long prehensile-like tail that ended in wicked pinchers. It stood up on its hind legs and lunged forward as the snakes made way for a horrendous vomiting of acid all over the hobos on the landing. 

Chung-Li, probably BoB as well, miraculously avoided being turned into a pool of bubbling goo. The wizard once again contemplated retreat but the thessylhydra was now virtually on top of them and outrunning it would be an even bigger fool’s decision. It was fight time. Steve stepped forward and quaffed a potion of growth while Rhags and Biff took position on his rear flanks to hold back any snake heads from hitting the spellcasters behind. As Giant Steve began to manifest Chun-Li and Ding-We released fireballs at the hydra that was now back on all fours, coiling for a leap. It shrugged of the conflagration and sprung the thirty feet to the landing. The snakes raced towards Rhags and Biff as the tail pincher grabbed Steve in serrated clamps that held him for the maw to brutally rip into him. Inside that maw was more acid. Steve had a bad feeling as BoB did her best to tenderize the thing from afar. 

 

Mason was throwing healing as fast as he could. They would all die or all survive, Yrgg be praised.

 

Our bums finally mounted a counterstrike. 

Huge Steve carved into the hydra’s breastplate. Rhags saw an opening and activated his ring of jumping to attempt a death from above. Landing his sword into the back of its head he held the blade deep and opened a mighty gash as he slid down to the cavern floor. As this occurred the two arcane casters simultaneously released barrages of magic missiles. With a deep abyssal groan the thessylhydra went limp and fell backwards. 

Rhags looked up, “oh oh.”. The dwarf barrel-rolled in the nick of time only getting dinged by a thick reptilian leg. 

 

“Does it regenerate?”, Ding-We yelled down to Rhags. 

“I don’t know”, was his response. 

“Burn it anyway!”, came from Steve as he rushed back down the floating stairwell. Even our dim fighting-man knew that a second round would spell doom. 

Biff and Rhags began chopping off snake heads as Steve doused the body with oil. 

IGNITION! 

Standing around the burning slab gripping weapons just in case it twitched.

“Smells like chicken…hrmm”, Biff was having a hard time gripping his sword rather than grabbing a chunk.

“Sure does pal.. sure does. What a shame never eaten hydra-thing”, Stevie expressing a little disappointment.

A gout of acid bubbled up wrecking both of their hunger fantasies. 

“Maybe a little too much picante”, accurately interjected Mason.

 

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 330893 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 238116 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 520141 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

 

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 105034 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 67231 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 80364 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 105226 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

(713 b) days at beginning of session (DreamlandsàFar Southern Basilisk Hills)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

708d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Ninety-Nine when we ask the questions:

Does this thing have murderous acid babies roaming around somewhere in the cavern?

Is there treasure and if so where?

What does that other arch lead to?

Is this actually a dungeon?

Tale of the Tape

Good fortune sometimes even favours the addled. 

KILLS

The Thesselhydra

LOOT

Nonesuch

The Sleeper has Awoken (Session 297)

SESSION 297:  In, Out and Back Into the Snake Nest 

MEANWHILE: Harangued by a wicked gargoyle and then they dug into a sleeping monstrosity’s lair.

 

Day 266 Continued (15.23): Ding-We redoubled his effort to convince Mason and Rhags that they would come back to consecrate this pit of vile evil. The desecration was sinking into all of their bones. Even if they were not ambushed during the night they would be haunted. They would return to camp. Let the backtracking begin. 

The things about gargoyles is that they are patient. Our missing maggog had just stood at the end of the corridor from the medusa lair and waited for hours. When came bumbling along the hobos got lucky and avoided surprise allowing Ding-We to put up a protection just in time to stop an incoming lightning bolt. The maggog let out a curse and then disappeared into the blackness to prepare its next ambush. The gang discovered a blob of magical darkness in the corridor to the statue chamber. They buggered about and then dispelled it and then stampeded into the chamber. No maggog. The thing was tricky. They continued towards the exit but got distracted. There was another passageway, parallel to the one that lead to the tomb. This one though was blocked. It appears to have collapsed was Chung-Li’s thought. “Nope. Look at this sidewall. Something dug in and then went that way and smashed things down behind when it went thattaway”, Rhags pointing at pieces of evidence to support his hypothesis. “Nothing we can do aboot that now, let us blow this popsicle stand”, Ding-We ignoring that it was his diversional decision. “Hmphf. Sure pogo”, Biff giving an expected admonishment that garnered a chuckle from Steve.

 

They rolled into the black shrine due north of the entrance. This was when Mr. Evil attempted to strike again. It was invisible and came from behind trailing the smell of cleric. Just as it laid up to lay out Mason Biff’s guts told him something was there. He let out a call and Steve raced back to join as Mason moved out of harm’s reach. Foiled again! The maggog tactically repositioned. Escaped again! The delvers made the final push for the exit and were once more in the stone garden. The trek back to camp was a snowy slog. The night in the Liwil hex was uneventful.

 

Day 267 (14.23à15.23): The wizard had come up with a plan overnight and tailored his spell memorization to such. They returned to the corrupted dwarven ruins to have their final battle with the maggog and discover what lay beyond the barrier at the end of the passage. 

The gargoyle did get to blast some of the dorks with a lightning bolt, and the wizard with magic missiles as it played a game of ambush. On the third strike it made a mistake. Allowing Steve and Rhags to charge it, after BoB had done a great job softening the thing. Rhags cut into its guts as Steve cleaved through arm, shoulder, clavicle, neck and its lower jaw. What a mess but a job, finally, well done. This all occurred outside of a locked door. 

Beyond was a training chamber with a respectable suit of dwarven plate, some old weapons, a staff and the gargoyles paltry treasure pile. “Ain’t gonna retire on that”, grumbled Biff. The others agreed. It was time to return to the collapsed passage. 

Through the use of powerful arcane magics Ding-We was able to burrow (move) through the earth to review a continuing passage. It lead to an archway and a floating stairwell that descended into a natural cavern. Flowing water could be heard and the stink of something floated on the dead air. Reaching the cavern floor Rhags tossed a light stone deeper. It was a big chamber and something was here beyond the light beyond a large pool of water. An abyssal groan and then a growl that was flanked by multiple hisses. Whatever it was, it was big as they could clearly discern earth and stone being crushed underfoot.

 

The sleeper has awakened and it don’t seem friendly nor small.

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 330893 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 238116 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                     

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 520141 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

 

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 105034 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 67231 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 80364 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 105226 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

Felix is in Liwil, good place for him

Elapsed Campaign Time

(713 b) days at beginning of session (DreamlandsàFar Southern Basilisk Hills)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

707d (Ding-We Gang Liwil)

 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Ninety-Eight when we ask the questions:

Are we in trouble?

Is it better to let sleeping monsters lay?

Did we really need to clear this hex?

Isn’t Winter a better time to be working in a laboratory making magic?

Tale of the Tape

Not to worry, I think it just showed up…

KILLS

Maggog -nasty piece of spell casting gargoyle 

LOOT

Smushed silver unholy symbols (2) 60 gp each

5 cp

35 ep

Jewelry (4): 1300 gp, 1200 gp, 800 gp, 900 gp,  = 4200 gp

Gems (5): 100,10,100,50,1000 = 1260 gp

Dwarven Plate +1

Staff of striking (22 charges)

Murder Beach Party (Session 253)

SESSION 253: On the Beach

Wandering around looking for the tube to the surface. A chance encounter points them in the right direction. Things, as they are apt to do, took a turn for the worse at the last possible moment.

 

Day 191 (12.20/0605): The crew disembarked one last time. Once more pressed out across the rolling sand dunes. They went SE in search of the wall. It was uneventful. Once there they decided to go that way (W). A couple of hours later a number of lanterns could be seen. Cautiously moving forward, it was a wagon with five footmen. Hailing the wagon they were greeted by the guards and once cleared they were escorted to the now stationary wagon. 

 

Out popped three sharp dressed men – Malaki, Palaki & Laki. They were merchants from Vermillion ( a City-State somewhere out there in the preposterously large underworld) each specializing in their own fine libation – rum, ale and wine. They were of a friendly sort but were in a rush, behind schedule to reach their destination to trade the vast majority of their wares. Never being ones to discount a trade opportunity they offered to sell their limited spare inventory. For some reason our gang decided to take this the wrong way and decided to be dicks. The merchants once more explained that they were concerned that they would miss their very important meeting if they tarried too long. Our gang continued to be indifferent. Once again the merchants showed their professionalism and satisfied our band of jerks and made a three-flavoured sale and then began to move along. We had to stop them one more time with a final inquiry – “Have you seen a gross wet hole in the wall?”. 

They had, it was the other way about ¾ of a day. “Now we must truly did you adieu”. With that the leader of the guard cried out “Double time otherwise this diversion will wreck our mission those damn flippers are flighty!”.

They went that way and the hobos went this. Sometime later fatigue began to set in and camp was made. Steve cooked up the last of his fish reserves and they settled in. It took a little while but the fish roast attracted attention. A trio of hungry griffons stealthy attacked from above during the first watch. They swooped out from and back into the darkness causing some challenges until Saff was convinced to fly up and illuminate beyond the camp light. She took a nasty pecking and would sometime in the future fill Ding-We’s bed roll with centipedes to teach him a lesson – do not mess with the Queen of Ribbits. With Saff extending the visibility range they finally began to mount a strong counter attack. Two griffons were brought down and the third retreated into the darkness. The rest of the rest cycle was uneventful.

 

Day 192 (12.20/0605): They broke camp and made the final push for the tunnel. It took 3 hours. Bunny took a look and was convinced that this was indeed the tube they came down, handholds and all. A snack was had and then they began the grind back up to the surface. 

About ¾ of the hike was uneventful. Bunny heard scratching of many claws and then saw numerous glowing red eyes. A flash of scales. “Oh no…Basilisks!”, screamed Bunny as the beasts charged. Two immediately fell upon the thief while three others came up behind. Bunny was able to fend off being petrified again but still took a nasty bite before she made a hasty escape. The first two monsters hit the front line as the leadership group began to freak out “We gotta go nuclear now!”, screamed Ding-We right before he dangerously discharged a fireball that also engulfed the first two ranks of hobos. Saff and her wizard then started pulling out wands. The clerics brought forth protections to ward and aid. One basilisk down four to go. Steve and Dolec held the line. “Boys stand strong things are about to get real cold”, Ding-We moved upto the second rank and discharged his wand of frost. He well frosted the tanks and basilisks. The terrible beasts were frozen solid. Steve & Dolec only mostly so. This was a victory. “Gah! Why are we not back in Denethix? Who cannot see the warning? The damnable Basilisk Hills! They even have a cult for crying out loud….”, Bimbles once more reasserting his disdain for the country life. No one paid much attention as Steve, Dolec and Charles started opening the creatures guts and all sorts of stuff, shiny stuff, was spilling out. 

Looks like they hit a major payout. 

 

Ding-We derailed the celebration as he began yelling for gizzards.

It would take some time to deliver his demand. 

They would be spending some time in the tube before finally getting back to the surface.

So close, but not close enough.

 

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 339203 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C9) 301725 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 314678 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 233287 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 503926 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 282710 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 189378 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119078 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 72857 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 77674 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 56494 xp +10% <64000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Captain Alamend Strender the Swashbuckler (F5) 37745 <32000> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

Lester Flanders the Warder of Oceana (P5)  37504 xp <45000> +5% CRT XXXX

 

RESERVES

BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.

Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.  

            Elapsed: 50 days (from A-Team calendar)

Elapsed Campaign Time

632 (630) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Fifty-Four when we ask the questions:

Can’t we just get to the surface?

What about this Vermillion place?

Could we actually maintain a trading outpost down here?

Tale of the Tape

Rhags and Alamend are still rocks

Lester and Mason brought back from petrification through divine ritual.

Exploration Below the Blighted Sub-Hex

Location hex: 12.20

 

KILLS

Griffons (2) 

Basilisks (5) 

LOOT

20000 gp

5000 pp