Will Murder for Treasure (Session 105)

 SESSION 105: Treasure Hunt (8OCT19)

            After resting up we returned to the swamp with treasure map in hand. It is worth saying that we had the town out for the first ever giant crocodile barbeque. It was a party that tasted like chicken. Much pleasure and mayhem was had. 

            Returning to the treasure run. We made our way back across the swamp and then excavated our way into long forgotten barrow mound. It was not as straightforward as it seemed. A legion of restless dead and then a tricky trap that almost claimed Steve’s life. Stinking mimics are smarter than your average murderhobo. The mountain of gold hidden inside the mimic took a little planning to package up. We then realized that we had to head back to town – ugh. 

Encumbrance, resource management and time are real things you scabrous bastards.

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 120622 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 110461 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 101943 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Champion (D7) 77038 xp <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 78788 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 115738 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                  

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 224417 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 108204 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 38734 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 49813xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 100651<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 92306xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 30261 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 12992 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

230 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-six when we ask the questions:

Tale of the Tape

Sasha failed her morale check and resigned 

Carousing for All!

KILLS

Night Gaunts (4) 5600

Skeleton Warriors (24) 432

Undead Mimic 2000

LOOT

20,000 gp

Murder all the Way Home (Session 104)

 SESSION 104: The Looong Slog Back (1OCT19)

    All that remained of Otto was dust. We moved to the looting of the vampire’s lair there was some good junk. Afterwards, the hobos crawled their way back out of the bizarre man-worm factory to the surface. 

Back out on the barrow mound things were still wet and foggy or were they froggy? The gang were greeted by ravenous toads of unusual size. The toads were in no mood for negotiation it was all just ravenous hunger. After dealing with toad problem they finally got back into the muck and brambles of the moor B-lining for Helix. The fates were not done with our little murders they had even more troubles to face before bed. 

First it was a roving band of vile smelling undead scavengers that were devoid of treasure – of course. 

Secondly, we were ambushed by a trifecta of huge crocodiles. This probably could have gone horribly wrong but some one-legged wizard remembered that he had a wand of polymorph. Two of the giant reptiles ended up being turned into rabbits, that immediately hopped off into the mists, and the third was dealt with the old fashioned way- with pointy sticks and bad words. That one was dragged back to Helix, for reasons. Steve salivated all the way back home.The coming party would taste like chicken.

ROLECALL (XP Not Updated)

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 118776 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 108625 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 100107 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Champion (D7) 75202 xp <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 76952 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 113902 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                  

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 222581 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 106368 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 36898 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 48895 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 99733<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 91338 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 29343 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 12074 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

230 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-five when we ask the questions:

What next? The big doors? The big boat?

Tale of the Tape

 

KILLS

Giant toads (6) 498

Ghasts (12) 2940

Giant Crocodiles (3) 4500

LOOT

Iron coffer w/ three oblong eggs

Gold figurine of drunken dwarf 200 gp (500 gp to a Dwarf)

75 gp

3000 ep

Scrolls

            Treasure map 20,000 gp

            Cleric: Cont Light, Detect magic, Insect plague

            MU: Plant growth

            MU: Detect Invis, Hold person

Murder Hole (Session 103)

 SESSION 103: My last Will and Times, by Otto “the sandwich maker’ Von Grublelager IV (23SEPT19)

            For 400 hundred years, I have been a master. Consuming the weaklings like the cattle they are. Now, I have been beaten to my base form and pursued by a fae whore. I must push on, return to my crypt and reform. My revenge will be crimson and serrated. 

    Diving back down the well, having shaken off the maniacal fairy. Past his children sleeping in the earth. Through the hole, then through the muck. Floating past the breeding pits more maggot-like children writhing and growing in their pools of plasma. 

Where is that fool Solom Quor? His lupine prototypes have made a mess again, damn them. If he doesn’t get his little experiment in line I will snap his sniveling neck. Where are the others? Perhaps it is for the best that they have been delayed I don’t really want to retell this maddening turn of events. I will use my rest to formulate an insidious plan of revenge, yes there will be blood. Now I must sleep. 

Otto the Sandwich Maker returned to his sarcophagus changing back to cold dead flesh from his gaseous form to regenerate and dream of revenge. In his torpor he could not sense that by fire and blade the hobos were cleansing his lair. 

            What! Who dares disturb me while I rest? I have not had enough time I am enfeebled. 400 years, becoming a master hunter to only meet my final rest at the hands murderhobos. 

Meat, I curse you!

            

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 118776 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 108625 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 100107 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Champion (D7) 75202 xp <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 76952 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 113902 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                  

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 222581 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 106368 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 36898 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 48895 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 99733<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 91338 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 29343 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 12074 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

230 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-four when we ask the questions:

Are we done now? Can we go back to Helix?

What did we miss?

KILLS

War-worm Zombies (18) 378

Charnel Viper 29

War-worm Heroes (6) 810

War-worm grubs (30) 390

Solom Quor 135

Lupine Thralls (12) 240

Mother Worm 350

LOOT

Potions of healing (3)

400 gp

Tiger eye (4) 100 gp each

Bloodstone (4) 100 gp each

Goblets (3) ornate, wrought gold w/gems 2000 gp each

300 pp

Assorted gems (14): 250, 1000,1000,100,10,75,500,100,10,250,25,25,100,25 = 3460

When Push Comes to Murder (Session 102)

 SESSION 102: Not Quite ready to Leave (16SEPT19)

            We didn’t march far. Really just about the room until we discovered a secret door that revealed a long-forgotten passage. Some exploring later we found a couple of chambers that were once burial preparation chambers. After striking out on the loot front we pressed on northwards. This presented a passageway lined with doors that terminated at a bricked-up passage. Along the way to discovering this there was one door that was open and it was home to a pack of ghouls and ghasts. 

Punching through the bricks, we stepped into the ancient tomb of Rorteb Meerab and his two brides (arisen as a dread barrow wight and daghters of Gaxx respectively). He did have a trick up his decrepit sleeve – a pair of hidden runic golems! The fight was messy. Boris had one of his legs pounded into paste, the bones will never be right and he will always be a bit slower now. That aside, we got paid so it was a win – YAY! There was gold, oils, potions, items and a granite-like statue. The statue was ancient, of Nergal and heavy as hell (500 lbs.) it was left behind. We can’t persist in covering ourselves with unholy relics. But first, we grabbed some much-needed rest. Eight hours later we pressed on, this time egress would be the direction.

Back to the crypt of, used to be covered in, mirrors. Strangely the journey went without a hitch much like the rest period. Once we reached the surface that was when things started going pear-shaped. It started with the worst song ever. Mesmerizing a bunch of hobos whom stood slack jawed and glassy eyed awaiting to be taken away by the unseen horrid singers. They were harpies and a couple of their giant vulture friends. The fight took a little work but it got done. Unbeknownst to us the whole brouhaha had been observed by cold dead eyes that were in search of a nice meaty sandwich.

Otto “the sandwich maker’ Von Vam Va Va Grublelager IV (vampire) and his slobbery pals (dire wolves) were hidden eyes in the mist plotting dinner. He waited until a small group of hobos separated from the gang to collect thrown weapons. He materialized before Boris, Arno and Rammer in hopes of a quick charming while he sent his ‘hounds’ to attack the main party. Materializing attacking and then back to gaseous form he went trying to catch a meal or two. Eventually Otto found that he could not get the upper hand and elected to fall back into the mists. 

Ding-We and Saff had a different idea. Saff chugged back a potion of undead control and buzzed after Otto and demanded that he return and materialize. Silly vampire agreed. He then received the sacred hero huddle. This pounded him back into gas, returning to his crypt. Saff raced after calling with glee that she was chasing a fart. The rest of the hobos bumbled along the uneven and mist covered grounds of the barrow mounds trying not to lose the crazy little fairy. 

By the time they caught up with Saffron had already followed the fart known as Otto to an ancient well nearly reclaimed be the creeping brambles that rung the edge of the barrow mounds. She buzzed back to the rest of the horde almost gagging with maniacal laughter as she retold the story of the fart that went into the hole... Saff lead the gang to the offending orifice. They prepared for entry. Saffron exploded with delight as the gang entered the creepy hole.

WE MUST GET PAID!   

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 119752 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 112591 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 99073 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Champion (D7) 74168 xp <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 75918 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 112868 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 221547 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 105334 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 35864 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 48378 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 99216<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 90871 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 28826 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 11557 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

229 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-three when we ask the questions:

Just one more thing before we head back?

Will we go back in?

Are we getting the galleon?

Are we opening them giant doors of Nergal?

Tale of the Tape

Boris had a leg pulverized by a runic golem, he will never walk right again (-5’MV)

Carla energy drained -2000 xp

Bimbles energy drained -5000 xp

KILLS

Ghasts (2) 

Ghouls (10) 

Crypt Knights (6) 

‘Rorteb Meerab’ Barrow Wight 

‘The Brides’ Daughters of Gaxx (2) 

Runic Golems (2) 

Dire Wolves (8) 

‘Otto the Sandwich Maker’ Vampire –beaten into gas 

Harpies (7) One escapee 

Giant Vultures (2) FLED 

LOOT

Runic Tablets (6)

400 gp

300 ep

Oil of Piercing +1 (4 jars)

Necklace of Prayer Beads

Gauntlets of Ogre Strength

Bracers of armor (AC 2)

Potion of gaseous form

Potion of Hill giant strength

Potion of Super-heroism

Potion of Growth

Potion of Delusion

Potion of etherealness 

The Great Doors of Nergal (Session 101)

 SESSION 101: Just a Little Deeper?  (09SEPT19)

     That’s what she said, but Ding-We was feeling town-sick. His plan did not gain much traction the rest of the horde felt a little light in the pockets and pushed for further exploration. Creeping further down the corridor, passing a number of doors left for later exploration, they came to a sizeable antechamber that had once been rather opulent.

    At the far end of the chamber they had found a giant pair of ornate steel doors that followed the classic Nergalian style. All creepy in the open exaltation of death. The portal had clearly not been opened for many years. Evidenced by the buildup of detritus along the seems but the bas-relief carvings should signs of upkeep. The continued adulation of Nergal was evidenced here. Further inspection suggested that the portal was sealed notably beyond simple closure, magics ancient and strong were detected. An elaborate keyhole that the thieves felt was best left unmolested until they were jamming in the proper key. They almost considered Ding-We's earlier plan of retreat but them pockets were not filling themselves. A little more searching and exploring would be conducted.

    In a room immediately adjacent to the  antechamber was a sealed magical stone door or plate without key hole. This obstacle fuelled further searching in the outlying area that resulted the first guess being perfect. A room that had a bunch of holes in the back wall that contained all the murderhobo food groups: treasure, magic, possible death and secrets. The big secret was a lever that when Rammer gave it a tug the sound of grinding stone could be heard to the north east. 

    Collecting their loot they went back to the stone door to be greeted by Minos a humungous minotaur. Hanging from his neck was a great black metal key that produced a dark purple glow. The hobos knew what the needed to do, and as such they charged Minos with abandon. The beasts over-sized axe happily cut into hobo flesh. Minos may have had the guns but the hobos had the numbers. It was only a matter of time before the mob took control and brought the great Minos low. They then liberated the funky looking key from the corpse and since they were feeling chuffed decided to check out a few more local chambers.

There was more treasure acquired in short order. A horde of zombies and some other dead denizens of Barrowmaze both protected valuable for some long forgotten reason and were nice enough to be adorned in death masks of the highest quality.  Mithril that the dwarves dreamed of melting down and reshaping into legendary gear. The hobos were feeling loose and lucky. We were totally ready to rock through the possible final portal.

Nah. “Let us go back to Helix”. So, they did an about face and marched off.

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 118327 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 111166 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 97648 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 69243 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 74493 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 111443 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 220122 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 103909 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 34439 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 47663 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 98501<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 90156 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 28111 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 10842 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

        

Elapsed Campaign Time

228 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-two when we ask the questions:

I wonder if this will be an easy or hard trip back to Helix?

What is beyond these massive doors?

How is Ding-We and is Ding-We gonna get his galleon?

Tale of the Tape

natch

KILLS

Crypt Knights (6) 

Barrow Wight  

Ravenous Zombies (25) 

Minos the Minotaur of humungous size (subdued)

LOOT

Mithril Death Masks (6) 1200 gp each

Silver Funerary figures (6) 500 gp each

Runic Tablets (2)

Scarabs of magic stuff

1)    Silver - Insect plague (beetles)

2)    Electrum –Heal

Gold statue of Nergal

Symbols of Nergal silver (10) 50 gp each

Ring of Jumping (as per BM)

Large Diamond 2500 gp

Wand of Fiery Burning