War for Territory (Session 340)

SESSION 340: War for Territory: We are the Roadcrew II

Leisurely hex clearing uncovers a hole into the earth, never a good thing. 

 

Day 867 (BC 13.23 0805 à12.24 0805/0705/0606): Cloudy. The first basilisk of the season it must truly be spring. Camillus, for some reason not her own, was selected for gizzard harvest duty. She pulled it off (out?). 

 

Day 868 (BCà12.24 0806/0706/0607/0707): Clear. Today they would head south and check out the previously observed pit. Looks like it was a marble mine from way back now in a flooded state of disrepair. Getting closer activated the long forgotten security team. Rising up from the flooded depths came a trio of iron living statues. 

Day 869 (BCà12.24 0505/0407/0307): Clear. Easy day. No lairs or beasts.

Day 870 (BCà12.24 0408/0507): Unusually becalmed. Perfect day for something to happen or a couple of things. 

Let the holey moley day begin!

Sasha of the keen eye spotted hole number one above a streambank in some nice sedimentary soils. Something was off. There were a number of dead killer bees around the entrance. Something had happened but what? They found out as they approached the likely hive hole. Robber flies the mortal enemies of killer bees had likely destroyed the hive. Now, disturbed from their digesting the dozen flies were happy to eat our hobos as well. 

Stupid flies we are murderhobos and now you is dead. Rhags, the only one that sorta fit in the hive, went into the hole in search of treasure and came back with a couple of pints of honey. Skull-Crusher let Rhags know that he had found the bee’s treasure. Killer bee honey carried healing powers. “Woulda preferred coin but at least its golden in colour..”, was his gruff acceptance of something being better than nothing. 

 

Returning to the business at hand. Clearing the next sub-hex they still had lots of day left. They would need it. A hidden cave entrance. It was actually a passage into the earth but we had a few observations before coming to this conclusion. The cave had seen recent use and that the obfuscation was intentional. Sasha pointed out tracks not made by feet but pole or spike like, “Insect…hmmm maybe spider the type that normally are relegated to a web. And big. Real big But nothings shocking now then is it?”. She was perplexed by the absence of webbing adding that perhaps the tracks were from some entirely different abomination. Felix was about to say something but Rhags began the descent into darkness. 

 

The ranks fell in.

 

Team ‘R’: Rhagnar, Nara, Camillus, Azucar, Wendul, Willy, Skull-Crusher, Sasha and Felix

 

ROLECALL

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 288390 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth  

 

The Henchmen

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 122235 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 134877 xp +10% <150000> CRT 1d10/III

Missing three teeth

Felix Ignatius Hemlock the once skeletal Sleuth (I7) 48517 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Wendul the Magician (W6) 58518 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  69519 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Pilferer (T7)  45726 <80000>10% CRT 1d16/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Skull-Crusher the Vizekorporal of Crom (A5) 15589 xp <25000> +5% CRT 1d14/III

Azucar the Elven Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 88870 xp <120000> +5% CRT 1d8/II

 

 

RESERVES (Death Recovery) 

Ramrod the Cloned Thief - Recovering from death (yet again) 846 start (876)

Bimbles of the now creepy electrical eyes– Freshly not dead (881). 

Raul of more facial scars (-2 CHA) – no longer mostly dead (866)

Herbert the Gnome - no longer dead (867)

Elapsed Campaign Time

846 – Everyone Else for reasons.

858 – Carla-Team (at Dry Gulch)   

Domain Days

Gormandia: 8 (Start 838)

Bunnland:?

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Forty-One when we ask the questions:

What’s go’in on in Dry Gulch?

Where does this tunnel go?

What sorta arachnid thing(s) are in said tunnel?

Tale of the Tape

KILLS

Living Iron Statues (3) 

Robber Flies (12) 

Basilisk 

LOOT

80 gp

Harvested components: Basilisk gizzard, Killer Bee stinger, Robber fly bits (3)

Killer bee honey (2 pints)

We are the Roadcrew (Session 339)

SESSION 339: We are the Roadcrew 

Spring is in swing and we is back to expanding the hobo sphere of influence

 

Day 855 (Gormandia/ Liwil/ Camp): Under a cloudy sky the roadcrew set out. First the eight miles to Liwil and then pressing on to the edge of the controlled lands along the (once) King’s Road. The forward base camp was setup (14.23 0703).

 

Day 856 (14.23 0703 BCà13.23/0703/0603/0503/0604/0704 àBC): Clear day of lair hunting was uneventful. Sasha discovered horse tracks (approx. 8) but they did not elicit any action.

 

Day 857 (BCà 13.23/0403/0303/0404àBC): Clear. Nothing to report.

 

Day 858 (BCà0805 à13.23/0504àLiwil): Clear. Camp was moved on this day to reduce travel time. A rocky finger was discovered. Atop was a chimera lair. The beast fled but we got the loot. A mountain of coin, gems and jewelry. To the order of thirty stone. The day clearing day was cut short so the loot could be transported back to Liwil to avoid the imminent encumbrance overload. 

 

Day 859 (LiwilàBCà13.23/0806/0705/0706àBC): Clear. Back to work. A quiet day aside from discovering ogre tracks going to the south west. Noted and moved on.

 

Day 860 (BCà 13.23/0606/0605àBC): Clear. Today the totally pissed off chimera returned for bloody vengeance. It got some good swings in before being cut up for parts. 

 

Day 861 (BCà13.23/0505/0506/0607): Clear. Nice and boring day. Nothing but a semi-curious pack of jackals over-watching our clumping about from atop a well-placed hilltop.

 

Day 862 (BCà13.23/0304/0405àBC): Cloudy. Not much clearing today due to travel back and forth from the camp in the controlled lands (14.23).

 

Day 863 (BCà13.23/0707/0608/0507àBC): Cloudy. Ran into a trio of weretigers. Perhaps the same bunch encountered north of Helix during the winter excursion. Tough to say. 

 

Either way, they were more curious than anything. Rhags explained what they were doing, clearing the lands to expand the domain of men. The tigers didn’t really like the idea but then they were offered some sparkly stuff to find an alternative area to haunt. It worked. They each choose a piece of jewelry and then faded into the forest. I wonder if we will run into them again. Time will tell.

 
      Rhags placates the werebeasts with loot, good thing the wizard didn’t see that..

 

Day 864 (BCà13.23/0408/0407/0307): Clear. Fine day of hex clearing.

 

Day 865 (BCà 13.23/0306/0406): Clear. More tracks discovered today, this time big prehistoric beast prints. Determined to likely be that of the gnarly triceratops previously observed when exploring the weird plateau of the druids to the north east.

 

Day 866 (BCà 13.23/0205/0206/0305 àReloc BC 13.23 0805): Clear. Hex 13.23 cleared. Camp is relocated into 13.23 prior to further lair hunting in 12.24.

 

 

Team ‘R’: Rhagnar, Nara, Camillus, Azucar, Wendul, Willy, Skull-Crusher, Sasha and Felix

 

ROLECALL

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 288390 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth  

 

The Henchmen

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 122235 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 134877 xp +10% <150000> CRT 1d10/III

Missing three teeth

Felix Ignatius Hemlock the once skeletal Sleuth (I7) 48517 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Wendul the Magician (W6) 58518 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F7)  69519 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Pilferer (T7)  45726 <80000>10% CRT 1d16/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Skull-Crusher the Vizekorporal of Crom (A5) 15589 xp <25000> +5% CRT 1d14/III

Azucar the Elven Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 88870 xp <120000> +5% CRT 1d8/II

 

 

RESERVES (Death Recovery) 

Ramrod the Cloned Thief - Recovering from death (yet again) 846 start (876)

Bimbles of the now creepy electrical eyes– Freshly not dead (881). 

Raul of more facial scars (-2 CHA) – no longer mostly dead (866)

Herbert the Gnome - no longer dead (867)

Elapsed Campaign Time

855 – Everyone Else for reasons.

858 – Carla-Team (at Dry Gulch)   

Domain Days

Gormandia: 17 (Start 838)

Bunnland:?

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Forty when we ask the questions:

What will we find in the next hex?

Have things been going a little too smoothly?

Tale of the Tape

Weretiger trio well bribed for negotiated relocation 

KILLS

Chimera 

LOOT

24,000 sp

6,000 gp

Gems (18): 50,50,50,50,100,100,100,500,50,100,10,500,100,50,10,50,10,10 = 1990

Jewelry (9): 900*,1300*,1000,900,1600*,1000,1000,1100,1300 = 10100 (*weretiger bribes)

Components Harvested: Dragon wingtips, Lions claws

Thems be Cultin' Words! (Session 320)

SESSION 320: The Dreaming Caldera Pt.2: Getting Pummelled 

The ascent was the first of their challenges. 

 

Day 767 Continued - 768 (Wilds): A day was used and three winter wolf pelts were salvaged. Bimbles saw nothing but coin as our Elvish guides seemed a little more dejected by the relaxed hero schedule. 

Day 769 (Wilds): Back to hiking towards the cloud wall. The journey was unvenetful just slogging through the snow. They camped an hour or so away from the optical barrier. 

Day 770 (Wilds): The elves gave some final direction this morning, wished Borlax’s speed to them and the two groups parted company. 

The barrier was odd. Thousands of feet high and impenetrable by eye. They planned for the worse and tied everybody off. It ended up simply being a bank fifteen or so feet deep. Just enough to put a little fear into your garden variety murderhobo. Looming, even though it was still a number of miles away was Mt. Embersnake. They made their way working along the broken patches of forest to hide the approach.

By late morning they had reached the “faster/easier” (deforested side) Western trail up Mt. Embersnake. A six thousand foot ascent is a long hike before you factor in the all the switchbacks. They would make less than half the journey today. With this side of the mountain being in the open the gang decided to get invisible for the journey. 

It was only an hour or so before the first encounter. A gross little rotund man doing his best to run down the mountain from a pursuing group of baying gnolls. Acting quickly Charles and Dolec sneakily stretched a rope across the path, intending to trip up the gnolls. It did end up sorta working but the little fat guy failed his attempt to waddle over the unsprung trap. He skidded out. Inciting the gnolls to charge. The first two were wanged by the trap and then our troop engaged the group. Those invisibilities didn’t last long did they. The fight was quick. Five well surprised gnolls really stood no chance. The little fat and waxy guy, the Red Prophet, was grateful. Before skipping away giggled a prophecy pout and handed a dead rat to Lester. 

Eyeball, tooth, bone, and brow Blaspheme against the true god’s power For each destroyed, the birth forestalls And lucre grease thy grubby paws! Defile the organs with thy swords Then seek the master for your reward.

“The rat will show you the way to the Master”, were his final words. Lester did his good-guy best to appear gracious to the walrus-like man.

They watched him waddle-skip for a spell before continuing the ascent. All went well until high afternoon.

Swooping out of the sun were a trio of pteradon riders armed with bows and lances. They had the first move. Bow fire followed by dive bomb attacks. The run and gun pattern kept them out of melee, at least for awhile. Saffron pulled out her wand of paralysis to turn the tables on these black knights and their prehistoric mounts. For one of them it became very difficult to stay airborne when your mount can no longer fly. They crashed into the slope. The impact did not kill the rider forcing Bunny to become embroiled in a one-on-one. Slowly the gang got the fight under control and opponents began to drop (probably in part assisted by the cheating but too late to punish now). The fight ended the pay was pretty good and then they marched on for awhile more before setting camp.

 

Day 771 (Wilds): The camp on the slope was thankfully uneventful. It took about three hours to reach the summit. Invisible Bunny crept up and looked over the rim. The mountain was crowned by a dry, 300’ diameter, bowl shaped caldera. Cold winds blew a dusting of snow across its cracked earth. At its center sits a blackened and ruined marble pavilion. A staircase inside descending into the mountain’s core. An armor-clad, foaming from the mouth, elongated limbed giant, kneeled before the pavilion surrounded by javelins embedded in the cracked soil. Bunny fell back and then the group entered the caldera. Nothing happened, so they began running towards the pavilion. As they closed the range to a hundred or so feet away a voice echoed from all directions, “HAVE YOU HEARD THE MUSIC?” .

Then a little hooded gimp limped from the pavilion towards the hobos. Meanwhile the giant had arisen but stood motionless as foam bubbled from its helm and down its body to the dry earth. When the gang (whom began prancing and declaring they had heard the music) and the little guy halved the distance between it thrust forth an iron clad gauntlet and then shrieked “They have not heard the music!” 

The tyrant immediately grabbed two adjacent javelins and hurled them. The fight was on. The little guy now identified as a goblin made haste back towards the pavilion. Our tanks rushed the giant only to be greeted by an acidic foam vomit spray and then surprised by two more iron-clad giants erupting from under the earth. The fight started out on the wrong foot and only got worse. The tyrants seemed indifferent to physical damage as the smashed hobo with the mighty fists connected to their abnormally long arms. The clerics each transformed bundles of sticks into snakes in an attempt to distract the beasts to allow the gang to regroup. The giants gave almost no heed to the snakes after a couple of quick smashes obliterating scores of serpents. The fight was going really poorly at least they were able to neutralize the goblin before it escaped and likely sounded the alarm. 

Carla and Bimbles recognized an imminent defeat and called for a tactical retreat. Into the pavilion and down the steps they bolted to hopefully evade the reach of the tyrannical trio….

 

 

The A-Team: Bunny, Carla, Bimbles, Saffron, Charles, Dolec Da, Nara & Lester

 

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 358909 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C10) 323144 xp +5% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Bunny the Thief! (T10) 314754 xp <400001> +10% CRT 1d24/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 199399 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 113928 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 87256 <120000> +10% CRT 1d20/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Dolec Da the Hero (F7) 72515 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Lester Flanders the Guardian of Oceana (P6)  49775 xp <95000> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

743b days at beginning of session (Boris & Friends just outside of Liwil)

761a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

724d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Twenty-One when we ask the questions:

What just happened?

Those foaming long-armed giants were unusual weren’t they?

Is our crew rusty from their Winter retreat?

Who or what is the Master?

 

Tale of the Tape

We got to the precipice, lets keep pushing

KILLS

Gnolls (5) 

Pteradons (3) 

Black Wing Knights (3) 

LOOT

50 pp

3003 gp

2000 sp

Wolf pelts (3) @ 5,000 gp each

Coming of the Dream Eater (Session 318)

SESSION 318: The Coming of the Dream Eater – The Dreaming Caldera Pt.1: Reluctant Heroes  

The A-Team is called to step up once more and it took a little pushing to get them to be heroic, perhaps Newville complacency played a role.

 

Day 765 (Newville): Spring was fast approaching. Bimbles was counting down the final two or so weeks before they would depart this village populated by hand holding, singing and smiling weirdos. 

This being when a curve ball was thrown. 

A trio of Mountain Elves (whatever they are) showed up in town in desperate need of heroes. Something was eating dreams. A malevolent force that they had sourced to Mt. Embersnake. It was a massive volcano many days north, strangely unseen by a perpetual cloud bank a couple miles beyond the base of the monolithic extrusion. The elves had traced the rapidly spreading doom to the volcano through some sort of undefined mysticism, or some such similar thing. They had sent a party to address the dreaming bane, they never returned. 

Now the elves needed outside help before the evil consumed all dreams. 

Word of the heroes of Barrowmaze and newly anointed banishers of Orcus Claus were to be found in Newville. The Elves presented their petition and found the A-Team to be somewhat reticent in engaging the spreading doom…

Eventually the clerics capitulated to assisting if the elves brought them to the towering mountain in question. The elves were without alternatives and yielded. The following day our band set out into the late season snows. The first day through the semi-mountainous mixed forest was uneventful. However, as they camped on the second day they encountered, or were discovered, by the last of Winter’s ranging terrors. 

A frost giant with a pack of winter wolves. They were a tricky and keenly intelligent lot managing the gang’s fortified camp. The wolves cautiously worked their way through the defences to attack the guard as the giant happily threw boulders from somewhere in the darkness. A little bit of tactical acumen caused a lot of headache. Boulders rained down as wolves circled and launched at confused hobo. Bimbles screamed to not damage the wolves as they were bitey bags of money. The fight raged until wolves began to fall and the giant was finally sighted. The forces of hobo got things done.

 

“Looks like we is gonna camp here gotta get some more fine furs”, Bimbles had enough walking for a couple of days and they all knew the value of a good winter wolf pelt. If only Steve was here to do the job properly…

 

The A-Team: Bunny, Carla, Bimbles, Saffron, Charles, Dolec Da, Nara & Lester

 

ROLECALL 

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C10) 358909 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C10) 323144 xp +5% <400001> CRT 1d12/III

            +2 save to poison and internal body things; Double eat (gotta feed my baybay)

Bunny the Thief! (T10) 314754 xp <400001> +10% CRT 1d24/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY7) 199399 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 113928 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 87256 <120000> +10% CRT 1d20/IV

            Franz the Grave Return (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON) 

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON)

Dolec Da the Hero (F7) 72515 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d20/IV

            Missing five teeth

Lester Flanders the Guardian of Oceana (P6)  49775 xp <95000> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

743b days at beginning of session (Boris & Friends just outside of Liwil)

759a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

724d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Nineteen when we ask the questions:

What? What? What? (ya we is jumping all over the place).

Tale of the Tape

Nope.

KILLS

Frost Giant 

Winter Wolves (6) 

LOOT

13,000 gp

10,000 sp

Wolf pelts TBD

Snow Day (Session 306)

SESSION 306: Playing in the Snow

Not quite ready to delve once more the hobos completed the clearing sub-hexes around the Statue Garden.

 

Day 271 (Base Campàclearing): It was a nice clear day providing excellent visibility through winter barren forest. Back on his foot Ding-We was possessed to get the core hex-clearing done before venturing back into the dungeon. Nothing new but there was a twist. They would move base camp into the hex and setup just outside the dwarven tomb after they finished clearing the hexes around the dungeon.

Day 272 (Base Campàclearing): Clear day of looking for lairs. Presence not detected. There was a strangely knowledgeable and speaking copper coloured squirrel. It seemed unoffended by the hobos work and divulged some valuable information regarding the blighted forest just to the east. In particular of the entity known as the Master, the dark force that was a beacon for the forces of chaos.

Day 273 (Base Campàclearing): Today the gang finished exploring the satellite sub-hexes leaving just the Stone garden dungeon to finish before claiming the hex ‘cleared’. They were rewarded with a hole full of giant scorpions. Sadly, only scorpions were lost in the conflict.

Day 274 (Base Campàclearingà15.23): With the good weather holding the garrison packed up things and the party relocated to immediately outside the tomb. This took most of the day limiting delve operations to resolving the loot collection backlog- hydra horde and pelt collection from the trolls. This was well received by the garrison as more pelts make for better camping and more coin makes all things better.

The day was quiet but that evening the rest was disturbed. Lights in the night. Humans at least five, adventurers perhaps. 

“Hellooo! Is there space at the fire?”

 

The D-Team: Ding-We, Rhagnar, Steve, Chung-Li, Mason, Biff & BoB

 

ROLECALL 

Hobo Steve the Lord (F9) 339875 xp +5% <360,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 247098 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing thirteen teeth                  

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Wizard (W10) 529123 xp +10% <620001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

 

            The Henchmen

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 109529 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 71726 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Lama of Yrrrg. (C7) 84859 <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Chung-Li the Elvish Myrmidon Warlock (E6) 109721 xp <120000> +10% CRT 1d8/II

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

743b days at beginning of session (Boris & Friends just outside of Liwil)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

711d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Seven when we ask the questions:

Who the heck is coming our way?

With the entourage setup outside the dwarven tomb will we plumb its depths once more?

Tale of the Tape

Nothing to report

KILLS

Giant Scorpions (5) 

LOOT

53,000 sp (finally collected from hydra stash)

Bear pelts (10) 15 gp each 150 gp total

Chunk of amber 100 gp

Wait! These Ain't Orcs. Why is We killing Them? (Session 302)

SESSION 302:  Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. XXXIX – The Long Road Home Pt. III - 

The Long Walk in the Snow

 

Plans came and then they went so did our band northward to Liwil.

 

Day 290 thru 300 (19.29 Hob->14.23 Liwil): During the stay in Hob many ideas were formulated as well as pursued and paid for much to Raul’s chagrin but sometimes the road is circuitous. The final outcome came from talking to the right pair of very tall nomads with an ox. Bromus and Fescus were horse-folk. Tall and strong were these people that were another bit of legacy from the gene pits of the Crocodile Kings of many ages past. They were an odd pair but they were certain that Carrot, their ox, would be able to both carry the mountain of loot and Sasha’s petrified body through the deep snows to Liwil. 

During this time the gang also went to the local church. A place of ancient construction a well maintained, from a time when these lands were much more populated (Skeldrane Empire). Now it was a church of Yrrg and they were well received. It seems that news of their deeds had travelled from Helix. Brother Cliff was a patriarch in an odd place. There was also a paladin present going through the process of purification and spiritual grounding. He was of few words at this time as his prayers were tantamount. Back to Brother Cliff. He felt strongly that civilization would return to these lands and the presence of the ‘Heroes of Barrowmaze’ was just another sign to support this. Bro Cliff intently listened to our mob’s plan to build a new empire out of the wilderness. He gave blessing and some nice little helpers for the journey. 

The trip played out in their favour.

Perhaps Yrrg was in their court.

Sure there was a forest fire but they trekked  along the grasslands.

Forced to rest for a day due to heavy snows did not sink spirits.

There was also an earthquake but they were in the hills without worry of falling objects.

Yes they ran into a hobgoblin raiding party but they are just overgrown goblins, you would need a heck of a lot more to stop the hobo train.

Maybe they almost intersected with a bunch of rotten brigands but those guys turned tail and ran as soon as they saw the hobo horde.

The trip worked out very well. Perhaps that’s planning?

They rolled towards the gates of Liwil through the mining camp from where Felix made an appearance. “Well I have some questions for you all..”. They were happily distracted as Bromus and Fescus spoke up, “Our journey ends here. We will unload your goods and make camp around the outside wall. We shall be there until the wind calls us back to Eros”. 

After unloading they took final payment and made haste out of the cluttered shanty town outside the gate. 

“Well I wonder what’s new in Liwil?”, Boris mused as he once more set eye on something familiar for the first time in a long time.

“Let us find out”, was Raul’s simple response.

 

The B-Team: Boris, Ramrod, Raul, Sloth, Willy, Sasha, Wendul, Gurn, Katre, Herbert, Camillus, Lady Versamage & Skull-Crusher

 

ROLECALL 

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 280304 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 382229 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)                         

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T9) 189410 xp +5% <280001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L8) 207225 xp +10% <390000> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 130057 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Missing three teeth

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D6) 36662 <70000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 58370 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F6)  61551 <64001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  36758 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Katre Elf-Girl and Swordsman Conjuror (E4) 16881 xp <32000> +0% CRT 1d8/II

Lady Versamage Knight Errant (K6) 66654 xp <85000> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

Herbert the Master Gnome Trickster (G4) 16947 xp <30000> +5% CRT 1d8/III 

Skull-Crusher the Hellebardier of Crom (A4) 9921 xp <12000> +5% CRT 1d8/III

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

(733b) days at beginning of session (Far Southern Basilisk Hills)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

708d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Hundred-and-Three when we ask the questions:

Wow, can we now say the Siege on the Gangrenous is finally over after a meager 39 episodes?

There. Right there is Liwil. What will we do next?

Are our chums in town (nobody likes Felix)?

Have we learned that Winter isn’t for adventure?

Have we learned that rather than trying to mooch everyone we meet for supplies we should have we should be manufacturing said things in advance?

Who was that large gang of individuals that appeared to be human?

Tale of the Tape

Things went rather smoothly, monsters seem to also be on Winter break.

Sasha is still a brick

KILLS

Hobgoblins (14) 

LOOT

5000 cp

2000 sp

2000 gp

Gems (3): 500,10,500 = 1010 gp total

Can We Be That Honest? (Session 299)

SESSION 299:  Horse Fuckers! 

Back in civilized lands we find out that our gang has a hard time differentiating between negotiations with orcs and city folk.

A road discovered leads to a town. A stitch-up and poor inter-personal skills almost lead to a big mess. Sailing away the following day to the next hole in the wall, they may not figure out what the deal was.

 

Day 269 (15.41/0503à15.40): The biting cold was still hungry this morning. They pressed on. It was not long until the trade road was intersected and the march turned to the west. Late in the day smoke was seen rising from a structure in the distance. Ended up being an inn/ garrison. That evening they ate fresh hill deer as they huddled near the roaring fire in an attempt to rid themselves of the deep cold.

Day 270 (15.40à): The deep freeze finally broke. It would take nearly two days to reach Deepwater. They marched out under light snow.

Day 271 (15.40à): The day was clear and the band made Deepwater by mid-afternoon and ended up in the only inn in the town, the Speckled Trout, after some general snooping around.

Day 272 (13.39 Deepwater): Mild snow today as the gang went out to make connections. Looking for trade and services. They found some in this rinky dink port town. A sled was commissioned and the local priest, of Sarnis (Praise be Sarnis may we never run aground), Brother Halason was commissioned to fix our trio of broken arms along with Boris’s compressed vertebrae (that would leave him largely incapacitated for a week or so). 

This was followed by more ale and relaxing at the Speckled Trout until the City guard showed up. The mob had been accused, anonymously of course, of being degenerate horse fuckers. For some unfathomable reason Ramrod was allowed to take point on this interaction. Rammer got nasty, so much in fact that somehow Raul was drawn into the frenzy. 

It looked like we were a breath away from arrest and banishment before some idiot realized that our supposedly heroic hobos were acting like asshats. A fight with the guard and the ramifications thereof would completely undermine their broader regional goals. They finally shut the hell up and took a fine even though the accusation was way off base. Some of them were unabashed plant fuckers but horses, and donkeys for that matter, is where we draw the line. If they had less ale in them and maybe if the girls had been around smarter minds would have realized that something was afoot. The guards were just doing their job but there was someone(s) in the town that did not like our hobo presence. Nuance is lost on the twitty. 

It went down sorta like this...

“We’re not horse fuckers!”

“Someone sez you is strangers”

“We will destroy you for suggesting that we did any poking”

“We are only doing our job, sir”

“I want to see the judge!”

“We have been sent to resolve the matter”

-the following straight up vitriol from Ram-rob has been redacted due to its inappropriate nature.

-Raul started slathering at this point which will also require redaction.

“Fine how much? We better not be considered guilty”.

“Fifty gold sheckles each and the matter of transient horse fucking will be resolved”

“What does that mean!?!”

“Just pay them!”

“We will be on our way. We hope that we will not be required again. It may be best if you strange folk moved along at the earliest possible convenance”

“We are working on it!”

“A good day to you then and stay away from the stables”

The guards collected the fine and warned against any further copulating with the equine type before departing. 

Folks began looking differently at our gang. 

The weirdest of such with adulation, a creepy twerp wearing a straw stuffed blouse.

Sloth had a good cry because he was really confused by all this, “I like horsees they are nice…”.

Day 273 (Deepwater): A blizzard rolled in today dropping another 40” of snow. Sitting around the fire in the tavern until they needed to visit the priest for the day’s healing service.

Day 274 (Deepwater): The storm petered out in the morning but not before dropping another 4”. In the afternoon some of the troop set out to the warehouse district to figure out what is going on in Deepwater and to book passage up the river. They learned that the Blood did indeed connect with the Sarn but was impassable during the Winter. They could however travel to Hob, killing about half the travel back to Liwil. A deal was struck. They would sail in three day’s time.

Day 275 (Deepwater): It must be a climate crisis! No snow today but the mercury precipitously dropped. Another deep freeze signalled a good day to once more sit around a roaring fire.

Day 276 (Deepwater): The cold held. Activity again was limited to the required. Picking up the sled.

Day 277 (Deepwater): Today was supposed to be departure day but the deep cold held creating somesort of temperature inversion that brought thick fog. Booo.

Day 278 (Sailing 13.39à): The cold broke. The fog dispersed. The river boat to Hob departed.

Day 279 (Sailing along the Sarn): An uneventful winter day on the Sarn river.

Day 279 (Sarnà19.29 Hob): Another welcomed clear day and arrival in the walled town of Hob. An ancient glowing smelter greeted all that arrive along the river. It was an industrial waystation that once tied together the larger network of the Skeldrane empire. Given direction by the Captain of the skiff the hobos made their way to the only Inn in town (where have we heard that before?) Hooper’s. It was the dead season and the arrival of twelve hobos and a statue were warmly greeted by the innkeeper Mr. Hooper, he used to drive the boat it seems.

"We don't normally serve their kind", Hooper said gesturing at Sasha the Statue. He didn't want to be 'too by the book' business was really slow.

"Don't worry she's with us and the big goober will also eat her share", Raul pointing at good old lumbering Sloth.

Day 280 thru 288 (19.29 Hob): With Boris being bedridden to recover from his neck repair the gang hung loose at Hooper’s for the next eight days. This might provide enough time to figure how to traverse the wilderlands during the darkest depths of Winter. They did end up buying a pair of mules, we shall see if that works out.

I doubt it (x2) but maybe six or so feet of snow is not as much of a hinderance as reality dictates.

 

 

The B-Team: Boris, Ramrod, Raul, Sloth, Willy, Sasha, Wendul, Gurn, Katre, Herbert, Camillus, Lady Versamage & Skull-Crusher

 

ROLECALL 

Raul the Voyager (MD9) 276550 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III

            Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 378475 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)                         

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T9) 185656 xp +5% <280001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Bopper (L8) 205438 xp +10% <390000> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Missing ten teeth

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 130057 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III

Missing three teeth

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D5) 34745 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III

Wendul the Magician (W6) 56493 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I

Camillus the Myrmidon (F6)  59674 <64001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV

Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6)  34881 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II

            Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword

Katre Elf-Girl and Swordsman Conjuror (E3) 14934 xp <16000> +0% CRT 1d8/II

Lady Versamage Knight Errant (K6) 64777 xp <85000> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

Herbert the Master Gnome Trickster (G4) 15070 xp <30000> +5% CRT 1d8/III 

Skull-Crusher the Hellebardier of Crom (A4) 8044 xp <12000> +5% CRT 1d8/III

 

RESERVES

Elapsed Campaign Time

(713 b) days at beginning of session (DreamlandsàFar Southern Basilisk Hills)

689a (Bunny Group Newville) Busy until 779

708d (Ding-We Gang Lake of Abominations/ Liwil)

 

Join us for session Three-Fucking-Hundred when we ask the questions:

Why would someone peg our hobos as horse fuckers?

Did someone want us out of town?

If so, why would someone want that?

Why don’t we ever dig deeper in inquiry?

Why did nobody step in when Rammer got real dark?

Why did we treat the guards so shitty, they were just doing their job?

What the hell is wrong with “You People”?

Travelling through a base of 6-8’ of snow is easy right?

What does Hob have to offer beyond a couple of mules?

Tale of the Tape

Nothing special, Sasha is still a statue.

Oh and Boris recovering from his neck re-elongation.

No more broken arms.

KILLS

none

LOOT

nope