Back to the Pit (Session 90)

 SESSION 90: Home(ish), at last (29APR19)

    Splat. Dropped back into our own time and place. Nope. Well at least the place we left from, we were still a long way from Denethix. Is the nightmare of Carcosa finally over? Only time will tell. At least for now the gateway was gone and so we could convince ourselves that the serpent-men had been held back. With strange memories swirling in our minds of a frozen place called Norway. Our hobos gave their heads a shake to push aside these strange thoughts and focus on the here and now.     

    Things started as they do. A group of evil hieracosphinxes had gathered around our corpse pile in hopes that we were not dead. Dead meat totally sucks in comparison to killed meat. Shaking out the clouds of white lotus smoke from our minds we fought for our lives. Our reward was the personal belongings of a half-eaten adventurer. We then made haste for Helix. Back to town and straight to bed. They would have a team reunion thingy at breakfast.

    The next morning, with Rhagnar and Clone-Rod in toe we set out for Barrowmaze. It is high time we resolved its evil influence on the local lands. We ran headlong into a foraging gaggle of giant ants an hour or so into our marsh hike. They had real big mandibles and we bled a lot more than planned for so shortly after breakfast. It seemed that the Fates were to aligned with MurderHoboing today. We returned to Helix to try again tomorrow. The second attempt was better. Returning to the barrow mounds, we got into the maze and down to the chamber of pools where Clone-Rod drank deeply and felt more agile. After that we went back to the giant pair of inscribed Nergalian bronze doors that we didn’t previously have the guts to open. 

                                                Embrace Death                                  

    Inside of this very large chamber was a horde of sarcophagi being watched over by a giant statue of a warrior. It ended up being a bronze golem. The roof threatened to collapse during the battle but our hobos brought down the bronze goliath before being entombed. We then proceeded to loot with utmost vigour. Nothing was done to obfuscate the process. After 30 or so minutes of plugging away the watch group at the entry were filled with dread…

 

Heavy breathing, perhaps sniffing, claws on stone- distant yet ever closer.

A howl and then another and another, call and response.

Then a tone, anguished and harsh, from a flute?

All goes silent, and yet you know they are not far.

  

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Lama of TMB (C7) 92650 xp +10% <100001> CRT 1d10/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Lama of GSS (C7) 90488 xp +5% <100001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 88819 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 54462 xp <70001> CRT 1d24/V

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Ranger (MD6) 52816 xp +10% <60000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 95765 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth                               

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Magician(W6) 73444 xp +10% <80001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 88231 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d16/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Burglar (T5) 19543 xp +5% <20001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 39822 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d14/ III

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 90660 <130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Clocker (L6) 47564 xp +10% <81300> CRT 1d16/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 40270 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Naked Purple Jiva Girl (P2) 2532 xp +5% <4400> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

-empty-                        

Elapsed Campaign Time

207 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Ninety-one when we ask the questions:

Tale of the Tape

-nada-

KILLS

Hieracosphinxes (6) 

Giant ants (18)  

Mongrelmen (8) – Parlayed

Bronze Golem  

Iron statue  

Ochre jelly – Put the lid back on the sarcophagus 

Death scarab

Barrow mummy

Barrow wight

LOOT

Black pearl 500 gp

Silver scarab

Electrum urns (2)

Gold canoptic jars (4)

Potion of strength

Silver earrings 30 gp

Chunk of amber 150 gp 

Runic tablet

Warnings not Understood (Session 64)

 SESSION 64:  Right, Where are We Going Now? (22Jan18)

             Ouch. These are some aching skulls. Attempts to piece together the previous night’s revelry did not go well. Oh, and we discovered an eyeball on Lenny’s back along with a host of questionable cysts. Nevertheless, we had an appointment with Muzzah. Lenny couldn’t get worse in the short-term – right?

            Muzzah was off the amphetamines and that made his concern with universal balance very clear. Another dimension is pushing its way into our reality. Rewriting the celestial order. Real bad mother fucking stuff. He had identified a coming bridge or more poignantly a portal during the next harvest moon. He needed us to investigate, travel through, and collect information and artifacts on what lies beyond. We had 2.5 days to travel to the site, ancient ruins of a temple to a forgotten evil goddess, about 5 miles north of Helix. We had nothing better to do so we hit the wilderness. The true home of a MurderHobo.

            The journey was fairly classic, the environment went from pleasant to foreboding. The ruins rested upon a hillock, punching an opening in the forest like a festering sore, marble structures jutting scabrously from the apex. A levelled temple and a ceremonial circle wrapped in two rings of offset marble slabs adorned in time worn glyphs. Careful investigation was conducted. Nothing except the ravages of time, until we entered the circle. An altar ancient yet newer than the surrounding ruins, dead centre. A stunted black tree wearing a crown of antlers and adorned in hanging ornaments composed of wood and bones in strange shapes. In front two stones, like broken teeth each with a carved spiral pattern.  Before the jagged teeth sat a ceremonial stone dish inlayed with an unknown symbol and holding three ancient gold coins bearing a design of unknown origin along with a crumpled piece of parchment. Uncertain of the implications our gang went back to investigating the site in search of a way into the earth- there must be a dungeon! The day wore long and night came. 

    Under the baleful watch of the moon giant owls attacked. Once we got our bearings they were dispersed. Shortly after a thick fog crawled up the hill like claws from the grave. It came bearing gifts more black stunted trees each adorned with cryptic ornaments. The following morning while disposing of the carcasses downslope a gross of giant killer frogs, attracted by the smell of death, leapt out of the forest in search of breakfast. They to were driven back. We used the second day to really get our search on. Pulling up the tree at the altar a skull was discovered of ophidian origin, inscribed within the cranial bowl with the same symbol seen on the marker stones. Mystery level rising and it rose some more and then during the darkest hour of the second evening reality began to flicker. Where we had a raging bonfire an archway with bronze doors began to appear between seconds. Then each second became longer and longer. The fire was gone and instead there was an inscribed archway bearing ornate doors. The other world has merged with ours, what lays beyond can only be known as adventure.

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Lama of TMB (C7) 70241 xp +10% <100001> CRT 1d14/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Lama of GSS (C7) 68077 xp +5% <100001> CRT 1d14  /III

Hobo Steve the Myrmidon (F6) 63415 xp +5% (101) <70001> CRT 1d30/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 54462 xp <70001> CRT 1d24/V

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

Raul the Wayfarer (MD5) 25408 xp <30000> CRT 1d20/II

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 66357 xp +10% <70001> CRT 1d24/V

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face                           

Lenardo the Technician (S7) 57128 xp +10% <100000> CRT 1d10/I

            Light wound: permanent loss of two fingers (pinky and next) left hand

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Magician(W6) 51041 xp +10% <80001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Sharper (T7) 57839 xp <80001> +10% CRT 1d30/II

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D5) 26622 xp +5% <35001> CRT 1d20/ IV

Akercocke the Minotaur Warder(M6) 47356 xp <80001> CRT 1d14/ III

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 79210 <130001> CRT 1d14/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Roughneck (L5) 31680 <36960> CRT 1d24/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 28820 xp +10% <50000> CRT as cleric

 

RESERVES

Ramrod the Cloned Burglar (T5) 19543 xp +5% <20001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

            Being cloned 45 days

                        REMAINING RECUPERATION: 13 DAYS

Elapsed Campaign Time

158 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Sixty-five when we ask the questions:

What is beyond?

Where is beyond?

Tale of the Tape

All hearts continue to pump, but this was a big setup Im certain.

KILLS

Giant Owls (3) 240

Giant Killer Frogs (11)

LOOT

Three golden coins older than time.

Eight Times the Trouble (Session 33)

 SESSION 33: The Crawling Fog (05DEC16)

     The fifth day in Greenwood rolled in on the creeping tendrils of a fog sporting unnatural thickness. Biting cold and wet, travel is slow. Eventually the trail begins to drop down and the grey gloom brightens as the trees open up. Welcome to the swamplands. Clouds of biting insects are your reward for surviving Greenwood. No time to complain smoke is on the air, then the clang of steel and from the mist runs a man covered in hundreds of egg sized spiders biting and encasing him in webbing. As quick as he appeared the mist again swallowed him and his screams. 

    Pressing on we find a bridge with an overturned caravan wagon burning and the scene of an ambush. The fog still not willing to give up all its secrets hides the true details. Little froglings leap about attacking the humans protecting the wagon. Spiders the size of mules also harangue the guards and on the other side of the bridge orchestrating the whole thing, spider-men. Bipedal tarantula-like beings 7 – 9’ tall wearing very expensive skinny jeans. Let us not get preoccupied with their modern idiot fashion sense, all hell is breaking loose. The front-line, of these beings, hurling spider baby balls that explode upon Raul and Calvin. They both fall to a thousand little bites and become encased in webbing in the blink of an eye. The big one in the back unleashes a mental attack that shows the horrors that await- all flesh will be consumed. The hobos regain their wits just as the frogmen horde closes in. We enjoy a grand melee, you imagine it I don’t have time or inclination to type it out. 

Then something strange happens, our murderhobos all of a sudden begin to fancy themselves heroes and decide to pursue the spiders with the intent of saving the soon to be victims. Treasure was also of interest they are murderhobos after all. Yes, I skipped the fight. Just like i said. The key takeaway was that the spider-things took off with their encased captives as our hobos were swarmed by the froglings (I suggest researching tarantula and frog mutualistic relationships). Into the mist in pursuit the terrain begins to rise. Moving up the hill they discover the hive of the Tarantulons and with a little bit of sneaking and murdering they get in unnoticed. 

A maze of web tubes, spider traps and sneak attacks brings our horde face-to-face with the hives broodmother Thelob. A massive bloated creature the size of a cabin sitting upon her dais flanked her hand maidens and two statues of blood red stone. Images of her master or god perhaps? A spider with the head of a wicked looking woman somewhat human and somewhat elven. They are greeted with a lightning bolt and then, as usual, hell breaks loose. Boris gets off a couple flasks of oil off and we have burning spider. Thelob lets loose a psionic blast, her alien intelligence is too much for some of our group - crushing mental capacity. Ramrod seeing the battle tipping in favour of the spider grabs a stone and has Carla cast silence on it and he dashes in.His intention is to counter Thelob’s verbal component of whatever spell she was going to drop next. The opportunity is too much for him and he performs a backstab. She is not happy and turns on him. The spider queen pummels Ramrod and then gives him the kiss of death. Ramrod falls dead. Seconds later Thelob also succumbs to mortal injury. Victory, and we save some people too but it came with a cost. A wealthy family, a couple of guardsmen and the wagon driver are in tow but no stinking treasure... 

They make a hasty retreat. Escaping the hive they are confronted by the Psychic Master and a horde of dog sized spiders. This gets messy. Len-ardo falls summoning his surtuepede to return him from the brink, it does not work properly. Strange green boils rise up on one side of his face. The child also gets it, and so do the guards and driver before the battle ends. The band move further down the slope and set camp too injured to press on to the town today. But not too hurt to get treasure! Back into the hive, there must be loot to loot! 

Back in they go and this time they seem to discover more spiders and traps. Sloth falls after being swarmed by spiderlings, he saw the light but needed to come back and ask Ding-We if he should go to it or not. “Damn loyal mendicant that one”. They press on sensing treasure is near. It was, in a chamber they had not paid much attention in on the original delve. “Sheeee-it! Coulda saved us some resources”. After dealing with the males of the colony our hobos got down to sifting through decades of desiccated husks to find a veritable horde of treasure. Packing up the loot and fallen Sloth they made their way back to camp unmolested. While no one was watching Bimbles pulls a scroll from his sleeve and Ramrod becomes a little less dead. “It was him or the kid and that kid ain’t done nothing for me”. Morality out in the wilderlands is about survival and nuttin else. 

On that note, our hobos can bask in the glory of this five hour work day. They were heroic, they were hobos, they murdered the opposition and they got paid.

 ROLECALL

 Carla the Green Prefect of TMB (C5) 19998 xp +10% <25001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Ding-We the Theurgist (W4) 19658 xp +5% <20001> CRT 1d8/I

Bimbles the Prefect of GSS (C5) 19186 xp +5%  <25001> CRT 1d12/III

Hobo Steve the Swashbuckler (F5) 17667 xp +5% (101) <32501> CRT 1d24/V

Rahgnar the Dwarven Hero (D4) 13365 xp  <17501> CRT 1d16/IV

                        Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

 

Raul the Wayfarer (MD5) 15936 xp <30000> CRT 1d20/II

                        Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, Removed one of his own nostrils.

Calvin the Bold Architect (MM5) 12518 xp <22400> CRT 1d12/III

                        Serious wound: permanent loss of INT -1

Lenardo the Professor (S4) 11839 xp <12000> CRT 1d8/I

                        Light wound: permanent loss of two fingers (pinky and next) left hand

Boris the Dwarven Hero (D4) 15613 xp <17501> CRT 1d16/IV

                        Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face   

Bunny the Burglar (T5) 14544 xp <20001> CRT 1d20/II 

 

Ramrod the Burglar (T5) 14840 xp  +5% <20001> CRT 1d20/II

                         Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

                        Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

                        Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

Saffron the Mad fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY4) 21892 <32501> CRT 1d10/II

                        Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

 

            The Henchmen

Sloth the Charger (L4) 8769 <16800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s,m)

Mar the Jester (J4) +1338+526+512+156 CRT 1d16/II

 

RESERVES

Mighty Yord the Slayer (B3) 10801 <16251> CRT 1d14/III

Mighty Nord the Slayer (B3) 11714 <16251> CRT 1d14/III

Hrolga the Amazon (CC4) +1338+526+512 CRT 1d16/IV

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

83 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)

Join us for session thirty-four when we ask the questions:

What is this Ironguard Motte gonna be like?

Will the people like us now that we is heroes?

I wonder if there is any neat stuff to kill and loot in this swamp?

Tale of the Tape

Sloth became spider food and went splat (2wks)

Len-ardo was perforated and infused with venom (2wks)

Ramrod – Dead and back again (2wks)

KILLS 

Froglings (24) Defeated  

Frogling sergeants (8) Defeated 

Tarotulas (4)

Tarantulon Catcher 

Tarantulon Psionic Master  

Frogling gaurds (6) 

Tarantulon Males (4) 

Tara-Drones (15) 

Spider swarm    

Tarantulon Breeders (5) 

Thelob’s Hand Maidens (8) 

Tarantulon Brood Mother (Thelob) 

LOOT

7800 sp

2000 gp

1800 pp 

Scoll (3 x MU)

Glass shield 

Short bow of fine quality 

Spear remarkable construction

Potion of ???

Potion of ????

a Girdle 

20 gems 

Assorted jewelry 40 pieces