SESSION 160: Still Trapped in the Gem Prison of Zardax
What does this frosty chamber have to offer I wonder? The hobos went in search and seizure mode. First they smashed some snowmen to find nothing but snowman guts, carrots and bits of coal. Next they went into the first structure within the chamber. It was a sleeping area with ten perfectly made fur beds. After some rummaging and ransacking nothing of value nor interest was found. Moving into the next building. It was rectangular and painted a pale bluish as was the larger chamber. Our eagle-eyed thieves immediately noticed to smallish fur bags at the back of the chamber. Rammer investigated, finding one full of coin and the other eight gold rings and a smaller pouch that was packed with teeth that appeared to be from children (size and condition). Well this weirded Ding-We right out as he obsessed on a way out of Zardax’s prison. “Nope, leave it. Some sort of fiendish trap and we ain’t gonna be suckered by it”. The thieves put down their pay bags and slowly backed out of the chamber.
However, before they left the larger room for destination unknown it was decided that the fountain was safe to investigate. For reasons only Ding-We determined. They used their magical heat cube thing to melt the frozen waters of the fountain. It sputtered back into service as a long lost and forgotten key was dislodged from its resting place upon the nozzle in the upper tier. It was grabbed and then our hobos got down to looking for a receptacle. Nothing was found and when they resorted to interrogation of one of the bound ice-people they got mostly crazy talk about being an elf. It did seem though that these dudes had either long since forgotten or knew nothing of the key. We pressed on after manipulating the fountain in every conceivable way just to make sure this wasn’t one of those riddles where the mystery and solution are in the same spot. For those just joining us, that is not how riddles, tricks and mysteries work.
Opening the main door revealed a square room of pure white. This was not from where we had come. The chamber had one other door and was under the influence of silence. The hobos silently crossed the chamber and opened the door. Revealing a vibrant greenish room with Elf scratch on the wall, in addition to another door. Translating the words really didn’t provide any clarity. The far door opened into a square room of pure white. It in all respects was exactly the same as the previous silenced white chamber. This time we were led to a new chamber of pastel blue with an obvious “Test your luck” type of gauntlet that led to a lever. Test your luck was actually written on the wall, we didn’t just make that up. The gauntlet was a narrow corridor with a series of seven mashers or squishers – whatever better fits the parlance of the times, as they say. Bunny was willing to do it. A little less so after Ding-We defined the rules of engagement. “No trickies, this being a luck test after all.” Bunny put the potion of gaseous form back in her pouch, “thanks for the help hop along…” “I could use my brain powers and perhaps avoid having Bunny squashed into paste.”, was Nara's kick at the can. “Absolutely not. If Bunny gets pulverized we fail the test and will likely never get out of this prison.” “oh right, good luck Bunny.” “Uh huh, wizard gets ideas thief gets to take the test.” Bunny began hopping her way through the mashers as we all waited for that Frogger getting run over sound. She made it to the lever. There was some real small writing above and below it, currently in the up position.
Bunny pulled the lever, it went CLICK. This was enough to trigger all sorts of conjecture as to what it meant. Many things were done as wild hypothesises were tested. In the end nobody was squished nor was the lever left in a different position than it was found. Whatever this means we can hang the responsibility on Ding-We the One-Legged Master of Paranoia. Ding-We turned around when he could no longer even stand his own back and forth and opened the door. He was greeted by two humungous humanoids with bug-like heads and a battery of crazy eyes. The first stormed over him to engage with the larger group while the second began to carve up our silly little wizard. Even with Ding-Dong prone and unable to use his magicks there was 14 more hobos ready to dog-pile the beasts. They were formidable but hero-huddles are deadly.
When we recovered from the battle and had one of the tanks open the door once more. Of note, the bug-thing-guys came from a bright yellow chamber but when Steve opened the door it was that vibrant greenish room from a couple of doors ago. No comment was made they just pressed on through.
This time it was a purple triangular chamber that had two other doors. It was also devoid of gravity and produced some chuckles when Carla tried swimming through and began to spin about uncontrollably instead. A rope trick later and we were back in the green Elf scratch chamber. This time it led to the grey corridor with the blue pillar that is believed to be a central rotating room. At some point, now forgotten or more likely not properly documented, were a number of other strange places and odd encounters: a grey limestone room overseen by a carving of a sphinx that time moved much faster and included another cat-elf encounter but this time they were not hostile, once more running into the stinger of the house sized silver wasp, a chamber full of flame and two encounters with odd floating eyeballs trailing gossamer chains. Of the two encounters one seemed of hostile intent while the other not so much.
Next was a reddish brown room with a well and a sign beside it. The sign was a warning that the well was broken and provided only bad luck. Carla took a look into the well. It was full of dog sized silver-headed grubs and they seemed hungry. After popping all the vile creatures and verifying that there was indeed water at the bottom of the well, both Saff and Bimbles tossed coins into it. This left both of them feeling little less good than just moments ago. Once more Mr. Ideas pressed the group forward. Through the side portal they went.
We were greeted by a vibrant orange chamber.
Hey didn’t we start here?
UGH.
ROLECALL
Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C9) 250538 xp +10% <300001> CRT 1d12/III
Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm
Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C8) 214778 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm
Hobo Steve the Superhero (F8) 212423 xp +5% <240,001> CRT 1d24/V
Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)
Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 177260 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)
Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)
Raul the Voyager (MD8) 188805 xp +10% <240000> CRT 1d12/III
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4,
Removed one of his own nostrils.
Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 404555 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I
Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)
Bunny the Thief! (T9) 184055 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II
Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand
Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 118078 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II
Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)
Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp
Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp
The Henchmen
Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Mad Ribbits (FY7) 137081 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III
Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts
Sloth the Bopper (L7) 135460 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)
Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic
Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 72067 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II
Wraith Drained: -1 CON
Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 84562 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II
Lasting injury: Crushed spinal column -6”H, -5’mv, -10% thieving
Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 88462 xp +10% <100000> CRT 1d10/III
Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 21490 xp +10% <32000> CRT 1d16/IV
Camillus the Myrmidon (F6) 59015 <65001> +5% CRT 1d16/IV
Greymin the Dwarven Hero (D5) 21691 <35000> +5% CRT 1D14/III
‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 59275 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II
Felix Ignatius Hemlock the previously Skeletal Sleuth (I7) 42208 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II
Mason the Canon of Yrrrg. (C6) 40211 <50001> CRT 1d10/III
Yasser Imaphat the Djinn (D4) 30372 <32501> CRT 1d6/II
Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swordsman (D3)
Wendul the Thaumaturgist (W5)
RESERVES
Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 45913 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV
REMAINING RECUPERATION: 0 DAYS
Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON)
Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON) -ADJUSTMENT REQ’D
Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 319718 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV
REMAINING RECUPERATION: 2 DAYS
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm
Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)
Multiple Injuries: lost 20 teeth, drools a lot CHA -1
Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT
Elapsed Campaign Time
341 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)
Join us for session One-Hundred-and-Sixty-One when we ask the questions:
How does this place work?
Where is the bloody exit?
What are these symbols supposed to mean, do they mean anything or is this just a cunning plan to drive us nuts?
What about those floating eyes?
Tale of the Tape
Nothing that I’m going to give away.
KILLS
Umber Hulks (2)
Giant Silver faced grubs (12)
Gigantic Silver Wasp – ran from it again
LOOT
2000 gp
Jewelry (6 pieces) 3020 gp
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