SESSION 143: The Hard Way Back
With a rest cycle under our wheels and Charles stuffed in the portable hole for future raising we made our dash for Helix. Yay! As soon as we got to the surface we found ourselves surrounded by zombies. We guessed, correctly, that this was Lord V’s legion of dummies. With his fall they lost command and just hung around. Until now when the smell of flesh became apparent. We nuked them good.
Back in the swamp and making a beeline for Helix. We were a ways off our usual corridor but pointed in the right direction. We ran into a rancid opening in the bracken covered mire. And lo arose the corpse orgy! A congealed mass of dead things. Hundreds of rotting faces of a multitude of species and races. Our horde ran at it and it let loose a scream from each of those rotting faces. Boris’s head imploded blood and brains were expelled from his eyes, ears, mouth and nose. He collapsed into the swamp. Writhing in his death throes. Many others were close to the same fate. “RUN AWAY!!” Sloth dropped his weapon like the giant-hearted lug he is and grabbed Boris as our group plunged back into that bracken choked swamp. We ran until Steve could run no more. Aid of the Gods was given to Boris. He stayed just on the right side of death’s door. We pressed on hoping for no more encounters, too many were already broken and bleeding.
We were so close, so close. And then a colossal creature crossed our path. Not only was it a brontosaurus but it was also a mobile dino-village. Rested atop a platform affixed to the beasts back was a strangely quiet settlement. How many lives do these cats have left? Ghouls exploded out of the hamlet grabbing ropes and vines doing their best Tarzan impressions as they attempted to consume all flesh. Again things did not play out in my favour as the hobos were able to eradicate the ghoulish swarm and then even release the ancient dinosaur from its servitude. It seems these were glamour ghouls and our reward was a mountain of jewels. Pressing on. Our hobos did actually get back to Helix. Collapsing back to our barracks the gang had a good long sleep.
Returning to business. We began our preparations to seek out the roc nest, there was certainty that this would lead to mucho treasure for our mongrels. Running concurrently with this: Ding-We sought out our wayward ranger Sasha to kiss her ass sufficiently to lead the expedition; Carla and Bimbles saw to the mostly dead Charging Charles calling down a direct spiritual channeling from TMB to bring CC back from the realm of death; the other idiots ate, drank and farted for a couple of days. Sasha was quick to point out the likely distance to the roc nest and the significant amount of time it would take to walk. Horses were ordered from Ironguard Motte. The horses showed up at the end of the afore mentioned ‘couple of days’ and we finally rode out on a fine morning.
What adventure awaits us in the vast wilderlands?
ROLECALL
Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 138876 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III
Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm
Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 182116 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d12/III
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm
Hobo Steve the Superhero (F8) 179047 xp +5% <240,001> CRT 1d24/V
Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)
Rahgnar the Dwarven Champion (D7) 136884 xp <140001> CRT 1d16/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)
Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)
Raul the Voyager (MD8) 161143 xp +10% <240000> CRT 1d12/III
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4,
Removed one of his own nostrils.
Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 315102 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm
Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)
Multiple Injuries: lost 20 teeth, drools a lot CHA -1
Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 376893 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I
Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)
Bunny the Thief! (T9) 208679 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II
Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand
Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 84702 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II
Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)
Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp
Missing six teeth talks with a lisp
The Henchmen
Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Mad Ribbits (FY7) 148497 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III
Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen
Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts
Sloth the Bopper (L7) 133152 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)
Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic
Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (P7) 72533 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d6/I
Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 67978 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II
‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 59275 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II
Felix Ignatius Hemlock the previously Skeletal Sleuth (I7) 42208 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II
Mason the Canon of Yrrrg. (C6) 40211 <50001> CRT 1d10/III
Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 45913 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV
Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON)
DEAD.
Yasser Imaphat the Djinn (D4) 30372 <32501> CRT 1d6/II
Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swordsman (D3)
Wendul the Thaumaturgist (W5)
RESERVES
FYI: Charles is dead.
Elapsed Campaign Time
319 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)
Join us for session One-Hundred-and-Forty-Four when we ask the questions:
Are we going to return to the Corpse Orgy in hopes of reclaiming our lost items?
Are we too lazy to do the crawl to find the roc nest?
If we are not, what evil, and adventure, lurks beyond the green oak forests west of Helix?
Tale of the Tape
The corpse orgy was way too much we ran like little bitches
Boris had another bad day, his head mostly imploded making him dumbner and he lost his sword (so did Sloth)
Charles was raised from death by the powers of TMB- Halleluiah!
Sasha was re-recruited
KILLS
Zombies (50) 1450
Ghouls (45) 2115
LOOT
Large rubies (2) 6000 gp each
8850 gp
61000 sp
A mountain of jewels (60) – 29,500
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