Murderversary (Session 100)

 SESSION 100: Where is the Treasure (pt. VIII)? (1Sept19)

            Hey, we is still celebrating that there is no Keeper to be seen. Looks like victory dance time will continue. What shall we do? Press on and get rich, of course. That is how we roll.

There were some obstacles. Notably more stinking cultists and a horde of stinking life draining wights. Sasha fared the worst but no causalities. We did get some sweet sweet swag but we spent far too much time squabbling to really get a horde. Maybe next time. 

Sadly, not much of a milestone for our little cretins. 

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 116816 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 109715 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 96397 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 67792 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 73042 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 109992 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 218671 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 102458 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 33688 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 46937 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 97775<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 89430 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 47385 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Sadhu Girl (P4) 10116 xp +5% <16600> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

Elapsed Campaign Time

227 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-one when we ask the questions:

Tale of the Tape

Sasha felt the chill of death and lost a level, Steve (-200) and Rammer (-700) were reduced but not horrifically. Note: In the future, level drain will be commiserate with level so expect a decimal shift.

KILLS

Wights (7) 

Barrow wight 

Steel skeletons (2) 

Zombies (2) 

Sapphire skeletons (6) 

Sons of Gaxx (7) 

Necros of Set

            Lvl 1(13) 

            Lvl 2 (2) 

            Lvl 3 (1) 

            Lvl 4 (1) 

LOOT

Electrum Death Masks (3) 500 gp each  

Silver scarabs decorative (6) 300 gp each 

Scarab of detect magic (1/day)

Scarab of the phoenix (6d6 fireball once)

Sapphires (6) 100 gp each 

3064 ep   

Murder on the Instalment Plan: First Payment (Session 99)

 SESSION 99: Against the Keeper (15Aug19)

 … where were we? Oh yes, “Zorp”. Welcome to the final battle. Us versus the Keeper, internet shitlord and final protector of the Tablet of Chaos the lost remnant power of Nergal and the cause of much, much, mucho evil. 

As I had previously warned you, the Keeper has prepared exhaustively for the real final battle. This IS the job he/it/them/they/we had prepared for during the last eon and we dicked about before showing up. The Keeper was ready. The summoned devils were ready. I had a new game lined up as survival seemed unlikely. We were not going to survive this battle. There was somewhere around zero chance, even if I went soft. Three rounds max. Our hobos were FUCKED. 

Sloth the simple bastard that he is just didn’t understand this. After weeks of having the Spear Predestined in his possession it had been whispering and directing him. Creating a force of Law, a protector of goodness. Sloth was the perfect canvas to be the implement of Ygg.

Sloth the glorious bastard ignored his imminent doom, as all hell was raining down on our hobos, and acted as the hand of Ygg the direct opposition of Nergal and raised the Spear Predestined over his head. The Keeper realized at the last second his/their error, redirecting his fiery attack directly at Sloth. It did not matter, even bathed in flame Sloth’s aim was true and his hand was fast. The spear sundered the tablet and ended the last remaining essence of Nergal, the god of death. The Keeper screamed, not in rage but in absolute soul crushing despair. All went white. 

As an aside, the Keeper and his summoned help were deadly but with the favour of the Gods and some timely luck anything can happen even the most mundane of travellers can surprise you.

            Our vision returned and we found ourselves back in our ‘secret sarcophagus passage room’. You would think there would be some sort of party but no, we pressed on to the north. Treasure was needed and it was found.

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 114806 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 107645 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 94327 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 65722 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 70972 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 107922 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 216601 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 100388 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 31618 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 45902 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 96740<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Clocker (L6) 58644 xp +10% <81300> CRT 1d16/IV or 1d4/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 46350 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Bhagat Girl (P3) 8641 xp +5% <8800> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

227 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred when we ask the questions:

We have beaten the boss, so treasure is now ours for the taking, right?

Why did that creep always speak in the plural?

Tale of the Tape

Sloth has become a mortal vassel of the powers of Law

KILLS

The Keeper – emotionally shattered

Mummies (8) 

Amber Jellies (2) 

LOOT

Staff of the Prestidigitator

Ring of Spell Storing

Dagger +4 Defender

Silver chalices (2)700 gp each

12 Terra Cotta Funerary Figures worth 80gp each. 

Mithril Death Masks (3) 3,000gp each. 

Scarabs of XXXXX on gold necklaces (2)

Gold Death Masks (2) 800gp each. 

Silver Death Masks (3) 400gp each. 

Scarabs of XXXX on gold chains (2) 

Silver Cloak Clasp (600gp), Silver Dagger Scabbard (500gp), Gold Necklace (500gp), Platinum Ring inlaid with Small Aquamarines (2,000gp), Jade Bracelet (300gp), Gold Belt Buckle inlaid with Small Black Opals (1,500gp), Platinum Nose Ring (600gp), Silver Circlet inlaid with Bloodstones (1,000gp), Jade Earrings (300gp), and a Silver Ring (500gp). 

Murder Me This (Session 98)

 SESSION 98  : The battle goes on and on (5AUG19)

            Falling back to the double doors of Nergal. After lots and lots of deliberation the portal opened to a creepy chamber over-watched by some creep sitting upon a throne. 

            “We are the Keeper and you are the first living guests in an eon”

There was some back and forth until he/it/them decided to test our mettle. It was challenging, but he/it/them was forced or elected to vanish. We cannot say which. We found a teleport pad that brought us to a laboratory that led to another throne room like chamber that was longer than the previous. And so, began our second battle with the Keeper. He/it/them was/were less jovial this time and he had demonic, skeletal and things in-between friends this time. Again, victory eluded our grasp. The Keeper, unbeknownst to us at this time, fell back to protect the Tablet of Chaos and prepare for the final battle. We wasted as much time as possible. Eventually we quit rummaging and solved the riddle of the four-point teleport system. Zorp! 

Next stop the true chamber of the Tablet of Chaos.

 

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 112781 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 105620 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 92302 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 63697 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 68947 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 105897 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 214576 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 98363 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 29593 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 44890 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 95728<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Clocker (L6) 52632 xp +10% <81300> CRT 1d16/IV or 1d4/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 45338 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Bhagat Girl (P3) 7629 xp +5% <8800> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

226 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Ninety-nine when we ask the questions:

Will we survive the battle of the Tablet or will Nergal’s minion annihilate us?

Tale of the Tape

The Keeper has been met twice but he keeps coming back!

KILLS

Crypt Knights (10) 

Barrow Mummies (2) 

Babau Demons Lite (2)

Necrolytes of Nergal (4) 

LOOT

Mithril w/gold & platinum inlay death masks (2) 8500 gp each

Resting up before Crushing Barrowmaze (Session 97)

 SESSION 97  : Messin’ Around (22JUL19)

            Back in Helix and resting up. The gang got some much needed time without the imminent threat of death. Ding-We was reading. Steve was convalescing. Nara was throwing money away. Saff was up to something but nobody noticed. The dwarves drank, what else would they do? Raul identified some junk. Carla had elaborate social improvement plans for the downtrodden and the newly converted to the mighty and yet benevolent TMB. Rammer, Bunny, Sloth, Bimbles and Sasha did… well we don’t really know, you can imagine your own downtown activities in a podunk swamp side village.

            Two weeks later, all fat with relaxation it was determined that it was time to once more venture into the festering Barrowmoor. Aside from muck and bugs the trip was uneventful. Back underground in the ancient tomb. We collected some vampire dust, from a previously staked coffin fella, before returning to our secret crypt. From there we went through the secret sarcophagus passage into a strange diamond shaped area. We found a false wall that led to a door proclaiming the power of Nergal. We took the clearly evil door and then another. This lead to a sarcophagus that was locked shut. We busted it open to battle a HUGE scorpion. Pressing on, the next secret door brought us face-to-face with a six-armed bone golem. The battle was intense. We rested afterwards. Our lack of treasure was emotionally draining…

ROLECALL

Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 112613 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 105452 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III

Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 92134 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 63529 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound:

Raul the Traveler (MD7) 68779 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 105729 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Injury: lost 6 teeth

            Injury: lost 5 teeth

            Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)                                    

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W7) 91408 xp +10% <160001> CRT 1d8/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated

Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 98195 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 29425 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp

            Missing six teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 44806 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 95644<130001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

Sloth the Clocker (L6) 52548 xp +10% <81300> CRT 1d16/IV or 1d4/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 45254 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Bhagat Girl (P3) 7195 xp +5% <8800> CRT 1d6/I

 

RESERVES

empty              

 

Elapsed Campaign Time

212 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session Ninety-eight when we ask the questions:

Where are we going?

Does anybody remember our purpose?

Have we been paying attention to things?

Tale of the Tape

Nothing.

KILLS

Huge Scorpion

Bone Golem

LOOT

Zip Zilch Nada