Boris and the Loot Hunters Pt. 1 (Session 165)

 SESSION 165: Boris and the Hunters of the Fabled Ring of Unari

            This way or that way? This was the revealed hidden passage and gawd dang it these sorts of corridors always lead to looty, and so they went north. Shortly after trudging forward they went down a short set of steps coming to a landing that either continued on and offered another stairwell to the west that descended towards a latched stone door within a framed archway with, another, obsidian bat head idol mounted on the capstone. What could go wrong? Boris opened the door. 

He and Sloth were then greeted by the angry pseudopods of a room sized gelatinous cube. They were going to close the door but then a keen eye noted loot floating in the cube in addition to three chests that could be seen within the room. Fighting the giant glob of gob from the corridor was a pretty good idea. Boris and Sloth, when it comes to fighting, are experienced and well outfitted much to the detriment of mindless blobs. As the thing oozed out of the chamber they hacked off chunks until the thing simply deflated and covered the crew in a thick viscous layer of snot. They waded their way in and the looting commenced. Sadly, it looked like more was floating inside of the cube than was ultimately recovered – a handful of gold, but the chests were another story entirely. Victory! 

Bob got down to counting while Raul investigated the items as Willy and Agolloch investigated the chamber. The rope and sword were nice additions to the armory, the potion was an unknown. Wendul, a dude that has not really spent much time with peg-leg seemed to strangely channel Ding-We when he declared all low grade coin was garbage – “this is the providence of sub-humans!”. The good stuff was loaded and the ‘B-Team’ exited the chamber and continued north. The corridor continued another 20’ before hooking west and descended once more. Further to the west was an elaborate obsidian door as well as another branching corridor going further north. 

The door. Polished and 7’ high with a bat headed key hole on central brass plate. Conventional and low-grade arcane noodlings were not successful forcing Wendul to use some magic with  little more heft – Knock! The door opened to a sepulchre bathed in green light. 

In alcoves upon the west wall, two thin glowing green rods rest in torch sconces illuminating the chamber with eerie light. Near the south wall, an exquisitely carved white marble statue depicts an anguished, decrepit looking older nobleman. In front of the statue rests a black stone altar with numerous bloodletting devices. Toward the north end of the chamber looms a richly decorative sarcophagus of black stone (Steve C). 

 Long story short, the group were vexed by this chamber for some time. It wasn’t until the statue was rotated, long after every other manipulation had been explored, that the sarcophagus opened and out popped the guardian of this sepulchre. Charles launched at it, with that unhealthy glow in his eyes, and nicely lopped off an arm. With its remaining upper limb it reached out and poked Sloth whom went ‘Zorp’ and disappeared. The group beat down the wretched unliving until it disintegrated into ash leaving behind a bat-headed key and revealing an exquisite sword that bore a message within the sarcophagus. “You might need this..” Felix provided further insight as he is wont to do, “I surmise that when one pulls this sword from the most elaborate scabbard and weld the blade against some creatures it is a simple enchanted blade…BUT if one was to produce this bat-pommeled blade against a creature deriving power from the negative plane of energy AND if we remember that the aforementioned negative plane is where the powers of anti-life arise and present us here on the prime material and sometimes other places with unrestful dead. In other words the walking dead, the arisen, that hate all life. An..” “Shut up Felix, we get it. Sword for undead”, shouted everyone except Bob (and Sloth for totally different reasons). With that done Willy was afforded the opportunity for reflection. Willy had the distinct feeling that Agolloch was not happy to see such a mundane blade in such a fine scabbard, “You never get me anything nice and all I ever do is keep you alive…maybe you should think of me a little more. I don’t ask for much to be happy.” Agolloch openly stated for all to hear. This made Willy a little embarrassed but showed his sword who was boss, “Yes dear, I should do better”. The team felt a little bad for him just for a moment until they remembered that Sloth had disappeared. 

Sloth after all is simply a child in the shell of a monstrous man. Fortunately Sloth had light and was not facing any mummies that could trigger his PTSD. There was a door before him, polished obsidian and with a masterwork lock, not unlike the door to the previous chamber. He elected to turn around to see what was behind him. “Goody, somewhere to walk”, there was a ‘Z’ shaped corridor that led to a chamber. As luck would have it that with the help of a little detection magic the rest of the team, seconds later, were about to enter the same chamber from the opposite side from Sloth, “Hey you guys!!”. Bob didn’t say anything but she did wave as it was nice to find the big meatball. “Hold on just a moment Sloth, let us investigate the nature of this chamber before any of us proceed further” exclaimed Felix without garnering any grumbles as this was probably a good idea. Unfortunately for Sloth he was already confused. Fortunately Bob translated the natter into one simple hand signal that Sloth could understand, mostly because she had been training him for the last month waiting for the ‘A-Team’ to return to Helix.  

 ROLECALL

Carla the Green High Priestess of TMB (C9) 259748 xp +10% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm

Bimbles the High Priest of GSS (C8) 223988 xp +5% <300001> CRT 1d12/III

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm

Hobo Steve the Superhero (F8) 221633 xp +5% <240,001> CRT 1d24/V

            Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)

            Touched from Beyond the Grave (Sloth): Eating disorder (x2 food) -5’ mve

            Blessing of Orcus (Consumption -1 CON)

Rahgnar the Dwarven Superhero (D8) 186470 xp <280001> CRT 1d20/IV

            Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)

            Critical Wound: disembowelled less able to process poison (-1 penalty)

            Missing three teeth  

Raul the Voyager (MD8) 198015 xp +10% <240000> CRT 1d12/III

            Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4, 

Removed one of his own nostrils.

Boris the Dwarven Lord (D9) 319718 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV

Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed arm

            Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)

            Multiple Injuries: lost 20 teeth, drools a lot CHA -1

            Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT                            

Ding-We the Peg-Legged Sorcerer (W9) 413765 xp +10% <470001> CRT 1d10/I

            Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated, runs at ½ rate (peg required)

Bunny the Thief! (T9) 193265 xp <280001> +10% CRT 1d20/II

            Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand

Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 127288 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II

             Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)

            Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)

            Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp

 

            The Henchmen

Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Mad Ribbits (FY7) 141685 xp <200001> CRT 1d10/III

            Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen

            Lasting injury: -1 STR, mashed guts

Sloth the Bopper (L7) 135460 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)

            Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic

Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Swami Girl (PS7) 76671 xp +5% <125000> CRT 1d16/II

Wraith Drained: -1 CON

Biff Bartley the Half-Orc Blackguard (HO7) 89166 <120000> +5% CRT 1d12/II

Lasting injury: Crushed spinal column -6”H, -5’mv, -10% thieving

Sasha Plasha the Warden (R7) 93066 xp +10% <100000> CRT 1d10/III

Dolec Da the Hero (F5) 26094 xp +10% <32000> CRT 1d16/IV

Camillus the Myrmidon (F6)  63619 <65001> +5% CRT 1d16/IV

Greymin the Dwarven Hero (D5) 26295 <35000> +5% CRT 1D14/III

 

‘BOB’ the Deadly Shade (N7) 59275 <90000> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Felix Ignatius Hemlock the previously Skeletal Sleuth (I7) 42208 <80001> +5% CRT 1d16/II

Mason the Canon of Yrrrg. (C6) 40211 <50001> CRT 1d10/III

Charles in Charge the Myrmidon (F6) 45913 <64000> +10% CRT 1d16/IV

Critical Wound: Punctured lung (-2 CON)  

            Mostly DEAD. (-1 CON) -ADJUSTMENT REQ’D

Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swordsman (D3)

Wendul the Thaumaturgist (W5)

 

RESERVES

Yasser Imaphat the Djinn (D4) 30372 <32501> CRT 1d6/II – He didn’t want to come out of his lamp.

            

Elapsed Campaign Time

376 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation) 

Join us for session One-Hundred-and-Sixty-Six when we ask the questions:

What is the secret of this chamber?

Has anyone been paying attention to clues, have there been any clues?

Tale of the Tape

Sloth had only been teleported and didn’t get into any trouble

KILLS

Gigantic Gelatinous Cube 

Crypt guardian 

LOOT

4,934 cp garbage

1,269 sp garbage

606 gp

rope of climbing

1,427 gp

152 pp 

potion of something..

3,297 sp garbage

971 gp

Broadsword +1 flaming.