SESSION 237: Siege on the Gangrenous Pt. 10 – Lost in the 4th Dimension -- Dungeon Meat
Hunger takes over and maybe we cross the line.
Day 182 continued; Status: Stage I dehydration; water supply – full 248 pints; Food – none
Uncertain what to do next the chamber of the Space Ooze is searched, the bones of Lady Versamage stowed away and we learn a bit about the young elf-girl (77!) Katre. Nothing helpful found or uncovered. They then dropped a bone through the ooze window/portal. It landed in the ‘space’ corridor. Disorganized and without a plan they decided to fall back to the ‘safe-space’ park for a drink before returning to the humming crystal chamber. They just could not leave the singing sword behind. It seemed that their growing hunger dictated wasting as much time as possible. Sloth grabbed the sword. It began singing and Sloth returned to dancing with it, Swinging the sword around like a conductor of some goofy orchestra. Still without a structured plan they once more headed back to the park. The commotion of their travel through the corridors of the 4th dimension made it easy for a troop of strange scaly apes to get the literal jump on the gang.
The apes were fast and rather aggressive.
The hobos hungry, slow and the frontline were already in haggard shape. Raul and Wendull realized that now was not the time to hold consumables. Magics were released from rod and wand. This turned the tide of the simian blitzkrieg and not a second too early. The apes were unrelenting, maybe it was the damn techno-noise coming from Sloth’s new sword. They did not say and we dd not ask. The fight was over, to the hobos once more went the spoils. These bad monkeys were packing an inordinate amount of loot. Coins, gems, jewelry and special stuff.
The gang grabbed the loot and returned to the park to examine their swag. Aside from the currency and sparkly adornments they now had a wand, a treasure map and a shield with a green copper foiling of a face that appeared about to vomit. Raul checked out the items while Boris and Gurn investigated the map, “Hmmm. What luck. It looks like the rough monkey map leads to right over their”, Boris pointing to a rock cluster just upstream partially hidden by the shade of an adjacent tree. “Yup sure does. We could use some more gold in case of an emergency” came from Gurn. The dwarves inspected and retrieved a loot filled sack from between the rock formation. Raul used this time to learn that the shield would not leave his arm as the ding-danged thing was cursed, “Ah. Crud…”.
After counting the mountain of coin and such liberated from the apes the hobos faced a new predicament. How the hell do we carry another 350 or so pounds? We would have to crawl and that would likely only lead to death by starvation. Sasha had one solution and Boris another. The ranger pulled a mule, with saddlebags, from her funky jacket and Boris figured they would need to eat the apes. He did not really care or know anything about man’s genetic relationship with monkeys or did anyone else for that matter. “We got enough dungeon monkey meat to get us back on our feet. Along with the stream we can rest here for two days to shake off our funk”. The plan was unanimously supported.
The big boys went back to the battle ground to claim their dinner. Luck held and nothing else was chewing on the still mostly fresh corpses. They returned and kicked off the picnic party. The park would not be left in the same condition as they found it.
“This stuff doesn’t taste like chicken”, was Willy’s observation. “No, no it doesn’t but I think I like it”, lisped Ramrod as he slurped some meat from a femur. Ike was happy to agree with the assessment even though he did not really know what chicken tasted like as he thought that knowledge would be ethically troubling.
Cannibalism has never been so easy.
Day 184 Status normal: water supply – full 248 pints; Food – none
During the halcyon days of eating ape within the perpetually pleasant and safe park the goobers had mulled over their next step. As they saw it, there were two options. There is always more options but the battered skull of your average hobo does not seem to keep track of such things. Either go through the ooze window or backtrack once more to the humming crystal chamber a check out the repeatedly forgotten ‘other corridor’.
They chose the latter.
It lead to the easy-side of a secret door. Beyond was the backside of a waterfall. After a quick wash they stood in a large circular chamber that was an open meadow covered in flowers and knee deep grass. The walls were rough granite. There were two passages exiting the chamber and the waterfall streamed down from some unknown source. The mule, Herb was happy to start grazing, with Katre standing idle beside. The real hobos pressed into the chamber. They were greeted by groans as zombies slowly arose from their grassy cover. Ike was hot and excited to smite some undead once more. For a bird-guy-thing he really does not like the walking dead. The zombies were slow and with only a slight numerical advantage that disappeared in seconds. A few seconds after that the party was over. Ol’ Herb barely had a chance to stop chewing.
The post petite melee looting turned up two things. First, one of the zombies had a wicked looking black longsword strapped to its back. Second, a small sack with four pieces of well-preserved meat inside.
Boris gobbled a chunk back and immediately felt better. Raul, figuring things could not get worse for him (Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation) gave the black blade a once over. The quillons, grip and pommel were in the form of a bound demon with the ricasso erupting from the demon’s mouth. There were also runes along the fuller. Felix would appreciate such description but we have not seen him in ages. Raul was no Felix by a long shot (some people like him) was able to piece together the nature of Demon’s Lament! He was elated to that he figured it out and was not the proud recipient of a second cursed item. So as a bonus he checked out the previously acquired, and almost forgotten, rainbow ‘prismatic’ belt. It was also not cursed. Instead it held the ability of a singular formidable illusionary magick each day. After that he tapped out and hit the shower – good work kid!
The hobos cleaned up and grabbed a drink as they once again stalled in committing to their next action.
ROLECALL
Raul the Voyager (MD9) 254688 xp +10% <360000> CRT 1d12/III
Fezzi-Gig (Neut: XXXX) Sword
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4,
Removed one of his own nostrils.
Boris the Electrical Dwarven Lord (D9) 356613 xp +10% <400001> CRT 1d20/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face
Wound: Bad leg (-5’ MV)
Multiple Injuries: lost 25 teeth (7 remaining), drools a lot CHA -1
Serious Injury: Brain Drain -2 INT
Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)
Major Corruption: Crackles with electrical energy
Ramrod the Cloned Magsman (T8) 157794 xp +5% <160001> CRT 1d20/II
Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)
Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp (-5’ mve)
Missing eight teeth talks with a lisp
The Henchmen
Sloth the Bopper (L7) 173261 xp +10% <178800> CRT 1d20/IV or 1d6/G (vs. s, m)
Missing ten teeth
Sasha Plasha the Warden (R8) 119090 xp +10% <200000> CRT 1d10/III
Gurn Hammerhand the Dwarven Swashbuckler (D4) 23778 <36000> +5% CRT 1d12/III
Wendul the Magician (W6) 45526 <80000> 5% CRT 1d8/I
Camillus the Myrmidon (F7) 83707 <120001> +5% CRT 1d20/IV
Willy the Reformed Burglar (T6) 23914 <40000>10% CRT 1d14/II
Agolloch the Eye of Purity (Lawful; XXXX) Sword
Ike the Duck (DF6)
Katre the Elf-Girl (E2)
RESERVES
BoB is the lone lawn ornament for the Basilisk Knights.
Brett & Jermaine Kobold Cooks & Eavesdroppers Extraordinaire – Cooking & Cleaning
Chung Li needs 12 weeks (74 days) and a stack of coin to rewrite his lost spell book.
Elapsed: 33 days (from group A)
Elapsed Campaign Time
604 (627) days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)
Join us for session Two-Hundred-and-Thirty-Eight when we ask the questions:
Really, just how adjacent to cannibalism is eating apes even if they did have scales?
Which way will they go?
Will our B-Team ever escape wherever they are?
Will they find a reliable source sustenance before they eat the Elf-girl?
And if they don’t will she really be much of a meal?
How the Hell did allow this much loot to be distributed to such a band of gombahs?
Tale of the Tape
Location hex: ??dreamlands??4th Dimension??Somewhere else??
Raul is now the proud owner of Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation
Lady Versamage’s bones travel along inside a sack
KILLS
Lorne Apes (6)
Zombies (15)
LOOT
The Singing Crystal Sword (Sloth)
Queasy Bert’s Green Shield of Capitulation (Cursed AC9)
Wand of magic missiles (17 charges; 1-2 missiles/rnd)
Demon’s Lament – Runed black longsword w/blade coming from demon’s mouth (+1,+3 vs. demons; Pro Evil 10’ 1/day)
Medicinal Meat (4) one consumed by Boris
2,000 pp
27,000 gp
Gems (31) 4,230 gp total
Jewelry (16) 14,800 gp total
No comments:
Post a Comment