SESSION 99: Against the Keeper (15Aug19)
… where were we? Oh yes, “Zorp”. Welcome to the final battle. Us versus the Keeper, internet shitlord and final protector of the Tablet of Chaos the lost remnant power of Nergal and the cause of much, much, mucho evil.
As I had previously warned you, the Keeper has prepared exhaustively for the real final battle. This IS the job he/it/them/they/we had prepared for during the last eon and we dicked about before showing up. The Keeper was ready. The summoned devils were ready. I had a new game lined up as survival seemed unlikely. We were not going to survive this battle. There was somewhere around zero chance, even if I went soft. Three rounds max. Our hobos were FUCKED.
Sloth the simple bastard that he is just didn’t understand this. After weeks of having the Spear Predestined in his possession it had been whispering and directing him. Creating a force of Law, a protector of goodness. Sloth was the perfect canvas to be the implement of Ygg.
Sloth the glorious bastard ignored his imminent doom, as all hell was raining down on our hobos, and acted as the hand of Ygg the direct opposition of Nergal and raised the Spear Predestined over his head. The Keeper realized at the last second his/their error, redirecting his fiery attack directly at Sloth. It did not matter, even bathed in flame Sloth’s aim was true and his hand was fast. The spear sundered the tablet and ended the last remaining essence of Nergal, the god of death. The Keeper screamed, not in rage but in absolute soul crushing despair. All went white.
As an aside, the Keeper and his summoned help were deadly but with the favour of the Gods and some timely luck anything can happen even the most mundane of travellers can surprise you.
Our vision returned and we found ourselves back in our ‘secret sarcophagus passage room’. You would think there would be some sort of party but no, we pressed on to the north. Treasure was needed and it was found.
ROLECALL
Carla the Green Matriarch of TMB (C8) 114806 xp +10% <200001> CRT 1d12/III
Scars: permanent loss left index finger and scarring on arm
Bimbles the Patriarch of GSS (C8) 107645 xp +5% <200001> CRT 1d10/III
Hobo Steve the Champion (F7) 94327 xp +5% <120,001> CRT 1d20/IV
Brain Damaged: reduced mental capacity (tough night on the town)
Rahgnar the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 65722 xp <70001> CRT 1d16/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of an eye (-1 to missile fire)
Critical Wound:
Raul the Traveler (MD7) 70972 xp +10% <120000> CRT 1d10/III
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -4,
Removed one of his own nostrils.
Boris the Dwarven Champion (D7) 107922 xp +10% <140001> CRT 1d16/IV
Serious wound: permanent loss of CHA -3, carved up face
Injury: lost 6 teeth
Injury: lost 5 teeth
Mental Illness: Unhinged (10% chance of lunatic behaviour)
Ding-We the Peg-Legged Enchanter (W8) 216601 xp +10% <320001> CRT 1d8/I
Critical Wound: Left leg obliterated
Bunny the Raconteur (T8) 100388 xp <160001> +10% CRT 1d20/II
Light wound: permanent loss of pinky finger, off hand
Ramrod the Cloned Filcher (T6) 31618 xp +5% <40001> CRT 1d16/II
Serious wound: Bad Back (-1 stone CC)
Scars: Neurological damage to hip, noticeable limp
Missing six teeth talks with a lisp
The Henchmen
Arnd Cobblestone the Dwarven Myrmidon (D6) 45902 xp +5% <70001> CRT 1d16/ IV
Saffron the Mad Fairy Queen of Ribbits (FY6) 96740<130001> CRT 1d10/III
Moderate wound: Scar on abdomen
Sloth the Clocker (L6) 58644 xp +10% <81300> CRT 1d16/IV or 1d4/G (vs. s, m)
Mental Illness: Mummy-a-phobic
Sasha Plasha the Guide (R6) 46350 xp +10% <50000> CRT 1d10/III
Nara the Nearly Naked Purple Bhagat Girl (P3) 8641 xp +5% <8800> CRT 1d6/I
RESERVES
empty
Elapsed Campaign Time
227 days at beginning of session (also applies to recuperation)
Join us for session One-Hundred when we ask the questions:
We have beaten the boss, so treasure is now ours for the taking, right?
Why did that creep always speak in the plural?
Tale of the Tape
Sloth has become a mortal vassel of the powers of Law
KILLS
The Keeper – emotionally shattered
Mummies (8)
Amber Jellies (2)
LOOT
Staff of the Prestidigitator
Ring of Spell Storing
Dagger +4 Defender
Silver chalices (2)700 gp each
12 Terra Cotta Funerary Figures worth 80gp each.
Mithril Death Masks (3) 3,000gp each.
Scarabs of XXXXX on gold necklaces (2)
Gold Death Masks (2) 800gp each.
Silver Death Masks (3) 400gp each.
Scarabs of XXXX on gold chains (2)
Silver Cloak Clasp (600gp), Silver Dagger Scabbard (500gp), Gold Necklace (500gp), Platinum Ring inlaid with Small Aquamarines (2,000gp), Jade Bracelet (300gp), Gold Belt Buckle inlaid with Small Black Opals (1,500gp), Platinum Nose Ring (600gp), Silver Circlet inlaid with Bloodstones (1,000gp), Jade Earrings (300gp), and a Silver Ring (500gp).
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